20 Possible Messages from My Tween Daughter

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Navigating the complexities of parenting a tween girl can be quite the challenge. As a mother, I often find myself feeling like a programmed machine, endlessly repeating the same phrases, only to be met with dramatic eye rolls and deep sighs. Afternoons are spent holding my breath as she arrives home from school, carefully selecting my words to gauge her mood.

Her typical after-school routine involves her staring intently at an iPad, headphones snugly in place. Just yesterday, she bumped into my partner, David, while obliviously walking down the hallway, despite him waving and calling her name to avoid the collision.

Lately, she has taken to addressing me as “Mother,” bypassing the more affectionate “Mom.” Most of the time, her response to me is simply, “I know, Mother.” This often occurs even as I’m mid-sentence, leading me to believe she possesses some sort of psychic ability. Perhaps she has a future as a fortune teller or an actress on a show like The Mentalist.

Since our interactions now mostly consist of me trying to instill some essential life skills (like reminding her to close the seven drawers she leaves open), and her retorting with “I know, Mother,” I’ve taken it upon myself to interpret what she might truly mean. Here are some interpretations I’ve come up with:

  1. I’m more knowledgeable than you are.
  2. You don’t make any sense.
  3. I’m completely tuned out of what you’re saying.
  4. I want my friend to come over, so I’ll pretend to agree with you.
  5. Your words sound like “blah, blah, blah,” especially when you reminisce about your youth.
  6. I’m one of the few among my peers without a phone or TV in my room, and it feels unfair.
  7. Instead of actually tidying up my room, I’ve shoved all my clothes into a container under my bed.
  8. I refuse to do what you just asked, but since I wasn’t really listening, who knows if it’ll get done?
  9. Why are you overreacting?
  10. I’m confused.
  11. You don’t get it.
  12. Nobody understands me.
  13. You’re so embarrassing.
  14. If I do what you ask, will you get me a new sweater?
  15. I know I promised to do it, but I’m too exhausted from binge-watching Netflix.
  16. I really don’t have any homework.
  17. What on earth are you talking about?
  18. I’m feeling down.
  19. I’m frustrated.
  20. I care about you.

It feels like just yesterday when she would follow me around, eager to climb into my lap and share her thoughts. Now, she seems to want nothing to do with me. I truly wish to connect with her again, making the last two messages more of a hopeful interpretation than a guess. I’m confident that if I listen closely, I can still hear her expressing her love, even if it’s accompanied by the typical eye rolls of a tween.

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In summary, understanding the unspoken messages from your tween can be challenging but is essential for maintaining a connection. Despite the frustrations, there remains an underlying thread of love that can still be nurtured.

Keyphrase: Understanding Tween Communication

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