6 Habits to Let Go of Now That My Children Have Grown (And 1 That I Can’t)

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For more than a decade, I was either pregnant or nursing. I spent years with a baby nestled in my arms, on my hip, or latched onto me. I wiped bottoms, read countless bedtime stories, chased away imaginary monsters, and meticulously cut grapes in half to avoid choking hazards. Then, in the blink of an eye, my children grew up.

Honestly, I can’t pinpoint the exact moment of transition. I don’t recall the last time I nursed a child or celebrated the end of diaper duty. I don’t remember leaving a store with an extra ten dollars because I no longer needed to buy diapers. Now, every shoe in my house either fits me perfectly or is far too large. My bras are no longer designed for nursing, and every morning, it’s just my husband and me in our bed.

The seamlessness of these changes indicates that I have adapted well to life without little ones. I miss the sweetness of tiny toes but enjoy borrowing my daughters’ shoes. I long for the days of rocking my babies to sleep, yet I now relish late-night Netflix binges with my kids. I miss the sticky kisses and jelly-faced grins, but overall, I’m handling this transition well. However, there are certain habits I need to shed as I enter this new phase of motherhood:

1. Eating Off Their Plates

In the past, when my lunch consisted of cold mac and cheese grabbed in haste, eating leftovers from my children’s plates was a necessity. Now, finishing their uneaten pasta or nibbling on discarded pizza crust is simply unnecessary—and frankly, a bit unappealing.

2. Wearing Old Pajamas

During those years of late-night feedings and messy toddler mornings, it was practical to wear my worn-out yoga pants and an old T-shirt. Now that I’m not dealing with leaks or spit-ups, it’s time to retire those ratty pajamas and bring back my pre-baby sleepwear.

3. Leaving Space in the Bed

For years, my husband and I shared our bed with one or more children. Even after the youngest moved to his own room, we kept a space open for potential nighttime visitors. Now, with no little ones calling, we still find ourselves sleeping shoulder to shoulder. Maybe it’s best to maintain that closeness.

4. Listening to Kids’ Music in the Car

My firstborn was calmed by the musical Oklahoma, and subsequent children enjoyed a variety of children’s artists. While some of that music wasn’t terrible, I now have the freedom to change the station to something more appealing like NPR without facing a backlash.

5. Hiding Vegetables

For years, I’ve been sneaking veggies into meals. But it’s time to stop pretending that pureed spinach is just an added seasoning. My kids are old enough to appreciate their greens.

6. Resorting to “I’ll Do It Myself!”

I often find myself exasperated when my kids struggle with simple tasks like loading the dishwasher or making their beds. Instead of stepping in to finish the job, I need to give them the space to learn and do things themselves.

Despite these adjustments, one thing remains unchanged: my fascination with my children. I used to marvel at my babies as they slept, feeling overwhelming love and a desire to give them the world. I savored their giggles and cherished their tiny hands. Now, although they no longer smell like baby soap and cookies, they still take my breath away. I thought their adorableness would fade, but it hasn’t.

While I knew I would miss my little ones, I didn’t realize that the joy of having older kids would be just as profound and magical. Although there are several habits I need to leave behind now that my kids are older, my admiration for them is not one of them.

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Summary:

As my children have grown, it’s become apparent that certain habits no longer serve me. Eating off their plates, wearing old pajamas, and the need to step in when they struggle with tasks are some of the practices I need to abandon. However, my admiration and love for them remain as strong as ever, proving that while parenting evolves, the joy of being a parent continues to thrive.

Keyphrase: parenting habits to change

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