Punctuality has always been a hallmark of my life. I pride myself on being on time, whether for meetings or social events. My grandmother often emphasized that arriving five minutes early is equivalent to being on time. However, this perspective shifted dramatically when my son, Leo, entered the world a week late after a challenging delivery.
Leo, a curious child who would often stop to collect rocks or marvel at the rain, presented a challenge to my precise sense of timing. His tendency to dawdle seemed to stem from developmental delays. During his early years, he received support from speech, occupational, and physical therapists. Our routine revolved around his needs, with meticulous planning to ensure he had everything ready in advance, from clothes to snacks. My vocabulary became filled with reminders to hurry up, often culminating in me physically guiding him out the door to our next appointment.
As the years progressed, I naively hoped that Leo would naturally adopt my sense of urgency. However, I soon discovered that his slower pace was not merely a choice but rather a reflection of how his brain processed information. This delay in processing and organizing thoughts became more evident as he reached the end of third grade, leading to academic challenges.
Determined to instill a sense of urgency in him, I found myself in a power struggle with Leo during his fourth-grade year. Each morning turned into a battleground filled with commands and threats, leaving both of us emotionally drained before the day even began. It became clear that my methods were not yielding the desired results.
Upon returning to work, my responsibilities increased, forcing me to reassess my approach. I realized Leo was growing up and could manage his own actions. It was time to adapt my parenting style.
Step One: Allowing Him to Be Late
One morning, I announced to Leo that we would leave at 7:45 a.m., giving him the freedom to wake up and prepare at his own pace. When 7:40 came and he was still in bed, I told him I would be leaving with his sibling and that he could lock up and join us later.
As I walked toward school, I turned back to see him still not ready. I dropped off his sibling and headed to the gate, still no sign of Leo. Eventually, as I made my way back home, there he was, walking up the sidewalk, dressed appropriately and smiling. For the first time in weeks, he seemed happy. We exchanged affectionate words, and I realized that we both had managed to embrace this new routine without stress.
Now, months later, our mornings have become more tranquil. Leo has learned to gauge his time better and often arrives at school before the bell rings, all without my constant intervention. His teacher has noted positive changes in his academic performance, thanks to the accommodations made for his special needs. I am learning to nurture Leo’s natural rhythm and accept that some things take time.
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In summary, allowing my son the freedom to navigate his mornings at his own pace has not only reduced stress but has also fostered a sense of independence in him. Recognizing and adapting to his unique needs has proven beneficial for both of us.
Keyphrase: Allowing children to be late for school
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