A few weeks ago, a friend’s husband tragically took his own life. After she had left for a meeting, he chose to end his life in their backyard. I witnessed the coroner’s vehicle arrive and subsequently observed the body bag being removed from their home, leaving my friend without her partner. In the aftermath, I reached out to her to offer support. She suggested that I tell my children her husband had died suddenly due to an illness, omitting the fact that it was suicide. While I can acknowledge that he did die from a medical condition, I believe it is essential to include the full context when discussing such matters with my kids.
I can’t avoid this topic. Mental health issues are prevalent in my family, and they are often discussed in my home. My grandmother struggled with bipolar disorder, and I deal with chronic depression myself. Additionally, I lost a brother to suicide a few years ago, a painful reminder of the seriousness of mental illness. This issue is not something I shy away from.
When my brother passed away, my children were only 9 and 6. I chose to explain to them, without going into distressing details, that people can suffer from illnesses that are not always visible, such as physical symptoms like coughing or fevers. I conveyed that my brother battled a mental illness, which ultimately led him to take his own life.
As my children have matured, we have talked more about the differences between normal sadness and serious depression. I have made sure they understand the signs that indicate a need for professional help and emphasized that mental illness is treatable, even though recognizing the need for assistance can be a significant challenge.
I discuss depression and suicide with my children because raising their awareness could potentially save their lives. Just recently, my daughter inquired about the semi-colon tattoo on my wrist. I explained that it serves as a reminder that, despite my struggles, my story is not yet over—similar to how a semi-colon continues a sentence. This tattoo symbolizes my choice to persevere and share my experiences.
By engaging in open dialogue with my children and others, I hope to foster broader conversations about mental health. Since my brother’s death, many individuals have felt uncomfortable discussing suicide with me. I want to reassure them that I am open to these conversations. I feel deep sadness, but I do not carry shame about my brother’s death. I aim to promote understanding of the devastating disease that led him to that tragic decision.
Unfortunately, for many who suffer from depression, discussing it openly remains difficult due to the stigma surrounding mental illness. I speak about these issues to make it easier for others to do the same, to raise awareness, and to dismantle the barriers that prevent individuals from seeking help.
In honor of my brother and my friend’s husband, I will continue to talk to my children about depression and suicide. I hope others will join me in these important discussions.
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Summary
Discussing suicide and mental health openly with children can be a crucial step in fostering awareness and understanding, potentially saving lives. It is important to break the stigma surrounding these topics and encourage conversations about mental illness.
Keyphrase: Discussing suicide with children
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