As I woke up on the morning of my 40th birthday, I was greeted by my parents’ cheerful rendition of “Happy Birthday” left on my voicemail at 8:29 AM, which I received while attempting to enjoy a few more moments of sleep. My husband was entertaining our two young children in the family room of our rental home in North Carolina, where we were vacationing. Shortly after, they burst in with heartfelt gifts: special rocks from our recent visit to a gem mine and a beautiful gold necklace.
The day continued with a chocolate birthday cake, ordered by my mother, adorned with the words “Happy, Happy Birthday POOPSIE” in frosting that seemed to express disbelief at its own absurdity. My mother insisted on repeating the word “poopsie” to the baker multiple times, showing no hesitation in calling a 40-year-old mother by such a whimsical nickname. I can only imagine that my own son might receive a similarly silly cake when he reaches this milestone.
This is what turning 40 feels like—a blend of excitement and skepticism when people question my age, and a mix of indignation and disappointment when they don’t. It’s a time of acceptance, such as realizing the necessity of a skincare routine, even if it’s as simple as washing my face nightly. The appearance of fine lines above my lip, which I used to associate with older generations, has made me rethink my approach to self-care, making visits to the dermatologist a more regular occurrence.
At 40, I strolled into a baby store and came to the realization that I no longer have many friends in need of baby essentials. After a decade of navigating the challenges of parenting young children, I am approaching a new chapter of life where none of my kids will require diapers. While this transition is exciting, it also stirs a bittersweet nostalgia.
Watching the trailer for Fifty Shades of Grey ignited a mix of revulsion and curiosity within me—are they really going to depict those scenes? And the lead is Sonny Crockett’s daughter? How intriguing! (Imagine if there were a middle-aged version starring Rob Lowe; I wouldn’t mind who played opposite him.)
Life at 40 also involves using platforms such as caringbridge.org to stay updated on friends battling cancer—a grim reminder of our mortality and the fragility of life. It’s disheartening to acknowledge that cancer affects not just one but several friends, but it’s a privilege to walk alongside them during such trying times.
In the realm of social media, I embrace Facebook and Twitter, and even Instagram, but I find Snapchat and Tumblr perplexing. As I contemplate my skills, I wonder if it’s too late to learn how to apply eyeliner properly.
At this stage, I find it easier to let go of negativity and discard relationships that offer no joy. While I might feel a twinge of disappointment over Adam Levine’s recent marriage, I also ponder if my heart-emblazoned sweatpants are too youthful for public wear, especially while binge-watching Good Luck Charlie.
I’m gradually coming to terms with healthier eating habits, such as incorporating kale and Brussels sprouts into my diet, but only if there’s cheese involved. Yet, there are moments when I struggle to accept my body as it is. I wish I could confidently proclaim my love for my body, flaws and all, especially considering it has brought my four children into this world. However, I still find myself grappling with feelings of inadequacy tied to my weight and appearance.
This year has also brought the heartache of losing my sister-in-law, a vibrant woman full of life. It has taught me the importance of having friends who not only support us through life’s challenges but also ensure that our legacies and stories are cherished by those we leave behind.
At 40, I recognize that age is not a dead-end but rather the beginning of a new chapter filled with opportunities. I have a clearer understanding of who I am and what I want, making me more determined to pursue my passions and relationships. Aging is a privilege, and I cherish the time I spend with my loved ones. Despite the wrinkles and the realities of life, I feel victorious simply by being present and engaged in my journey.
In conclusion, turning 40 is not just about reflection; it’s about embracing life with all its complexities and joys. For those navigating similar transitions, resources like NICHD’s pregnancy guide and the information available on home insemination kits can provide valuable insights into family planning and parenthood.
Keyphrase: Turning 40 reflections
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