By: Sarah Thompson
Updated: January 11, 2016
Originally Published: July 1, 2015
The director of my children’s preschool once remarked, “Parenting is essentially one long farewell.” At that moment, she aimed to ease the worries of anxious, first-time parents like myself, who were leaving their kids for the first time in a school setting. Those words have resonated with me ever since because they capture a profound truth—parenting involves a continuous cycle of saying goodbye and learning to let go.
Recently, my children experienced a significant milestone, as one concluded elementary school while the other transitioned from middle school. Instead of graduation, the term “promotion” is used, perhaps to signify that they are not earning a degree yet, but it still marks an important step in their growth.
I took the customary photos of them in their outfits, which they will likely wear just once. I managed to capture a moment of my son, Jake, as he walked out with 450 other middle-school graduates—many of whom I had never encountered before. Unfortunately, I missed a shot of Mia because we ended up sitting on the wrong side of the auditorium. I shared the pictures on social media with a light-hearted comment about them growing up, but beneath that facade, I am overwhelmed with emotion.
They are maturing, becoming more aware of the world around them. Their lives are increasingly separate from mine, filled with friendships and feelings they may not always want to share. Even when we are together, they often drift away, as is natural and expected.
In just four short years, my eldest will leave for college. That timeframe feels alarmingly brief. I catch myself saying things like, “Let me show you how to handle this, as it might be useful when you’re in college.” They look at me as if I’ve lost my mind, roll their eyes, and sometimes humor me. Little do they realize how quickly their time at home will pass.
This process is part of the inevitable long goodbye. We anticipate these milestones—the rites of passage that indicate growth—but nothing can truly prepare us for them. As parents, we must gradually allow them to venture out on their own.
While I cognitively understand this is a necessary aspect of the parenting role, my heart struggles to let go.
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Summary:
Parenting is a journey characterized by continuous goodbyes as children grow and become more independent. Milestones like school promotions emphasize the need for parents to gradually let go, even as their hearts resist this change.
Keyphrase: Parenting journey of letting go
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