Are You the Default Parent? Tips for Achieving Balance from Experts

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It’s no secret that many parents, especially mothers, often find themselves in the role of the “default parent.” This term refers to the one who manages the bulk of the childcare and household responsibilities, leading to feelings of burnout and resentment. If you’ve been scrolling through parenting TikTok recently, you’ve likely come across videos discussing this very phenomenon. It’s relatable content where parents air their frustrations about the overwhelming mental load of caregiving.

When I became a military spouse, societal expectations placed me firmly in the role of caretaker. As we started our family, it was assumed that I would handle the day-to-day responsibilities of our home and kids. I observed my mom do it for years and thought it would come naturally to me. But looking back, I now understand the toll it took on her, often leading her to retreat into her room, overwhelmed by the constant demands of parenting. I found myself experiencing the same feelings as a new stay-at-home mom.

Open Communication is Key

Experts suggest that the first step in alleviating this burden is open communication. It’s vital to discuss expectations and responsibilities with your partner. This can prevent default parent resentment from building up over time. If you’re seeking support or resources, consider joining a community like Make A Mom, a free sperm donor matching group, or explore at-home insemination options at Make A Mom, which offers a unique reusable option. For a deeper understanding of the process, check out their guide on how at-home insemination works.

Finding Inspiration and Support

Additionally, if you’re on a journey to parenthood and facing challenges, you might find inspiration in this heartfelt story. It’s important to remember that you’re not alone, and resources like the CDC can provide valuable information on pregnancy here.

Conclusion

In summary, balancing the roles and responsibilities of parenting can be tough. It’s essential to communicate and share the load to avoid feelings of resentment. Remember, you’re not in this alone, and there are communities and resources available to support you along the way. For more insights on pregnancy and home insemination, check out this excellent resource here.