The concept of the “family bed” refers to the practice where children share their parents’ sleeping space. It’s often described by child development experts as a cozy arrangement where family members cuddle together, drifting into slumber with limbs intertwined, creating a sense of safety and closeness. Soft, rhythmic breathing from your little ones may evoke feelings of warmth and tenderness, reminiscent of the womb. However, I find this experience quite challenging.
My reservations were reaffirmed last night when I allowed my son to sleep alongside me. I have never been an advocate for co-sleeping, and my personal preference leans towards having my own space at night. Even when my partner stays over, he is confined to a designated side of the bed, and any encroachment is met with visible discontent.
One aspect that is often overlooked is how physically disruptive kids can be during sleep. They have elbows, knees, and other sharp body parts that seem to move incessantly, transforming a peaceful night into a melee of kicks and jabs. Protective gear such as shin guards would have been beneficial during this encounter.
Around 2 AM, I was startled awake by an unusual noise—a sound reminiscent of nails dragged across a chalkboard. My son was grinding his teeth in his sleep, and I was taken aback by how much racket such small teeth could produce. Shortly thereafter, the snoring began—deep, resonant snoring that felt more suited to an elderly man than a child.
I’ve had similar experiences with my daughter, who, when she joins me, seems to expand dramatically, taking up far more space than I anticipated. I affectionately refer to her as “Origami Girl,” as it appears her body unfolds from a compact form into a sprawling presence at night. It is astonishing how much room these small beings can occupy.
Adding to the chaos is my son’s beloved stuffed animal, Funky Chicken, who seemed to have a watchful eye on my every movement throughout the night. At one point, I awoke to find my son sprawled across the bed, a clear indication that Funky Chicken might have orchestrated this shift in position as a form of retaliation for a recent washing.
Then, of course, there was the unforeseen “accident.” I won’t delve into specifics, but let’s just say that my bedding required immediate attention upon waking.
While I understand that many parents cherish the closeness of the family bed and the affection that comes with it, I personally find it at odds with one of my most valued needs: sleep. The comfort of observing peaceful, sleeping faces is overshadowed by the physical chaos that accompanies shared sleeping arrangements.
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In summary, while the family bed may work for some, it simply does not align with my needs as a parent who values a good night’s sleep.
Keyphrase: Family bed parenting
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