Life serves as a profound educator. Over the span of my 40 years, I have faced numerous challenges that have reshaped my beliefs and perspectives. The wisdom I’ve gained covers a spectrum of experiences—some deeply significant, like coping with the loss of a parent, advocating for the health of a surviving one, navigating menopause at 38, and confronting a midlife crisis shortly thereafter; others are more lighthearted, such as the implications of consuming prunes in public or the questionable choice of wearing makeup to bed.
Here are 40 key lessons I’ve gathered throughout my journey:
- True mastery of swearing comes with menopause.
- Pigs can indeed soar! Unless you haven’t boarded a plane.
- Always verify the presence of toilet paper before taking a seat.
- Avoid wearing eyeliner while sleeping.
- Cabotage* does not pertain to sabotaging with vegetables.
- A woman will always hope for her birthday to be celebrated—regardless of turning 41!
- It’s unwise to torment yourself with negative thoughts.
- Hide loose change where your partner won’t locate it.
- Ice cream does not surpass love, nor does chocolate exceed sex.
- Never inform your best friend that her diet is ineffective.
- Sneeze carefully when enjoying crackers.
- While not everyone possesses a photographic memory, many do have smartphones.
- Embrace the beauty of some mysteries.
- Math can affirm your humanity, especially during online logins.
- Consistently telling the truth eliminates the need to overthink.
- Some days, you’re the bug; other days, you’re the windshield.
- Spontaneity isn’t always advisable.
- Stay away from prunes.
- Make sure your life doesn’t become a cautionary tale for others.
- Some people have truly won the genetic lottery.
- Depression is not merely a lack of enthusiasm.
- Always wear underwear beneath white shorts.
- We spend one-seventh of our lives experiencing Mondays.
- Plant pumpkins only if you have a plethora of friends.
- Nudiustertian** does not refer to a Martian nudist.
- If love is blind, marriage is a real eye-opener.
- By the third bottle of wine, most of it will be forgotten.
- Exercise caution when handling gear sticks.
- Sometimes the villain is the true princess.
- Thinking about purchasing a treadmill isn’t the same as actually buying one.
- Sexual deprivation is a genuine issue.
- A remote control isn’t an ideal place for dead batteries.
- Brain farts are indeed a real phenomenon.
- Winning the Nobel Prize for silliness might not be the pinnacle of achievement.
- Locking yourself outside in your pajamas during extreme cold isn’t as humorous as it seems.
- Avoid lamenting your errors; instead, learn from them.
- The most terrifying phrase in English might be: “I’m from the government, and I’m here to help.”
- Tittynope*** is unrelated to any anatomical references.
- Women are also subject to rectal examinations.
- There’s still much for me to learn!
*Cabotage refers to the exclusive right of a country to manage air traffic within its borders (coastal navigation).
**Nudiustertian means the day before yesterday.
***Tittynope denotes a small amount of something that remains.
For additional insights on family planning and home insemination, consider visiting this resource, which offers valuable information on these topics. Also, check out this excellent resource for comprehensive guidance on pregnancy and home insemination.
Summary
These lessons encapsulate a blend of serious and humorous insights gathered over four decades. From the importance of honesty to the unexpected nature of life’s challenges, each observation offers a unique perspective on navigating existence.
Keyphrase: Life Lessons Learned Over 40 Years
Tags: [“home insemination kit”, “home insemination syringe”, “self insemination”]