Dear Class of 2018,
We have let you down.
As a member of this generation, I am ashamed of the unrealistic expectations we have imposed upon you regarding college admissions. The system is fundamentally flawed, and you are the unfortunate recipients of a convoluted process that has developed over the last few decades.
I sincerely apologize for perpetuating the belief that a 4.0 GPA is insufficient and that your efforts throughout high school are rendered meaningless. Let me clarify: achieving a 4.0 GPA is not just impressive; it reflects your dedication and resilience. This obsession with admissions has sent the wrong message to those we hope will lead our country in just a few short years.
I envision our future leaders being uplifted and empowered, rather than feeling defeated and disheartened. Instead of celebrating your remarkable achievements, we have conveyed that they fall short.
My office has been inundated with students who feel crushed after receiving disappointing news from colleges they aspired to attend. I empathize with their pain; it is genuine. While I firmly believe that we end up where we are meant to flourish, it’s challenging to convey that to an 18-year-old who feels their dreams have been shattered and their hard work rendered futile. It’s difficult to reassure them that everything happens for a reason when they’re facing rejection from an institution they had longed to call home. It’s hard to remind them that their worth extends beyond the narrow confines of a college acceptance letter, especially after being conditioned to believe that attending a “good college” is the key to happiness and success.
We are sending a confusing message, and the implications could not be more misguided.
Take the example of a friend’s daughter, Mia, who boasts a GPA exceeding 4.2. She served in student government for three years, participated in athletics throughout high school, and presided over a service organization. With an SAT score of 1460 and a nearly perfect writing score, she was also among the valedictorians at her competitive high school, attended Girl’s State, volunteered in her community, and maintained a job on weekends. She is politically engaged, passionate about social issues, and a remarkable individual. Yet, she was denied admission to UCLA and placed on the waitlist for UC Berkeley.
It’s incomprehensible to me.
I understand the reality of competition; perhaps there were others with even higher scores. However, it’s disheartening to send a message that says, “Sorry, not good enough,” to someone who has gone above and beyond for four years. This outstanding student is destined to make a significant impact in the future because she is well-rounded and driven to enact positive change. Any university would be fortunate to count her among their alumni, as she will undoubtedly represent herself and her institution with distinction. I hope one day she can reflect on her denial letter and, as a future leader, use it as a reminder that success is determined by who you are, not where you go.
Every high school senior should consider reading “Where You Go Is Not Who You’ll Be: An Antidote to the College Admissions Mania” by Frank Bruni. This insightful book offers a refreshing perspective on the college selection process and the flawed mindset that too many young people adopt, believing their future hinges on which institutions accept them. Bruni’s message is clear: where you attend college doesn’t define who you become.
One of the book’s most compelling examples references Condoleezza Rice, former U.S. Secretary of State and current Stanford University professor, who attended the University of Denver. She emphasizes that success is not a reflection of one’s institution but is instead about finding a balance between passion and aptitude. Great education is not a passive experience; it is an active journey. The depth of your engagement in college will pave the way for future opportunities. Rice notes that the relationships you cultivate—particularly with professors—will significantly influence the course of your life.
Ultimately, it is less about the institution and more about what truly matters. The term “good college” is highly subjective. Students often stress over attending a “good college,” and parents can inadvertently place immense pressure on them to do so, as if that will dictate their life’s outcome. This mindset leads to anxiety and panic among young adolescents when they should be enjoying life, attending school events, and learning vital skills for success. I know many successful individuals who attended community colleges or pursued trades and now find fulfillment in their work. That, in my opinion, is the true definition of success.
I attended a state university for my undergraduate studies, and while it may not carry the label of an elite institution, I believe it equipped me for success in numerous areas of life. I had fantastic professors who genuinely cared about student growth, mentors who inspired me, and some of the best friends I could ask for. Although our career paths diverged, each of us has found success in our own right. Reflecting on those days, we view our college experiences as positive, valuable, and integral to our life journeys.
Remember, gaining college admission is merely the start of your journey. If you faced denial from a school you hoped to attend, it is not the end of the world. Do not internalize rejection as a reflection of your worth or accomplishments. You are so much more than a letter or a test score. Acknowledge all that you have achieved to get to this point, and look forward to the opportunities that await you.
Process your disappointment—it’s natural—but don’t linger in it. Embrace the institutions that have recognized your potential. No single school is perfect; many options can lead to fulfilling experiences. Gaining admission to a prestigious institution does not equate to success. What truly matters is your determination, discipline, and perseverance.
Class of 2018, you are poised to accomplish remarkable things. You are ready to enter a world that eagerly awaits your contributions. Learn from our missteps and prioritize passion over praise. Shift your focus from status to satisfaction. Pursue what brings you joy, and take pride in every step of your journey. Stay hungry, remain humble, and uphold your integrity. This is your moment to discover your identity and embark on an exhilarating new chapter in your life.
Eyes forward. Mind focused. Heart ready. Onward!
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In summary, this letter addresses the misguided expectations placed upon the Class of 2018 regarding college admissions and emphasizes the importance of personal growth, resilience, and self-worth beyond acceptance letters. It encourages students to embrace their accomplishments, pursue their passions, and view college as just the beginning of their journey rather than the defining moment of their lives.