My three-year-old daughter is on the autism spectrum, and admitting this to you fills me with fear. She has put in tremendous effort to navigate her challenges, and I worry that revealing her diagnosis could make her journey even tougher.
While she may not exhibit the typical traits associated with autism, if I choose to keep this information to myself, perhaps you won’t notice it at all. You may observe her speech being slightly unclear at times, but few would criticize a child for having a speech delay.
I’ve learned from past experiences, like when I reached out to numerous preschools only to find their available spots suddenly filled after I mentioned autism. Despite clarifying that my daughter required no special accommodations and displayed no behavioral issues, it was disheartening to see educators, who should be understanding, react so negatively to a simple label. If they can judge a young child so swiftly, how might you view her?
Yet, I long to share that my daughter has autism. We relocated here two years ago and have been so consumed with her therapies that making friends has taken a backseat. I want to explain that our inability to meet is due to her consistent therapy schedule. Moreover, I hope to reshape the common misconceptions surrounding autism. So here it is:
My daughter is autistic but also incredibly well-mannered in her preschool class (thank you to the one school that embraced her). She’s bright, affectionate, and kind-hearted. She loves interacting with other children, sharing toys, and is even eager to help with tidying up. She is the happiest child I know and rarely has meltdowns.
That said, she is still a typical three-year-old who occasionally feels overwhelmed, such as during an Easter egg hunt when all she wanted was to be held instead of collecting eggs. She experiences anxiety when there are unexpected changes in her schedule, which can lead to distressing physical symptoms. She thrives on routine, needing lunch before noon, a nap at precisely 1:30 PM, and dinner by 5:30 PM. Additionally, she faces challenges linked to a rare speech disorder known as childhood apraxia of speech.
Despite all this, when you see me around, I will likely refrain from disclosing her diagnosis. After all, she is just a three-year-old child who has dedicated twenty hours a week to therapy to reach this point—a commitment that takes up nearly every waking moment outside of her naps and two half-days of preschool.
She has put in the hard work to master skills that come easily to others, like pointing, expressing emotions, responding to her name, and speaking. With the support of exceptional instructors, she has learned to enjoy activities like finger painting, tolerating the sound of a hairdryer, and visiting the beach. She needs the social interaction provided by preschool (or playdates) even more than many of her peers, and she deserves a chance to be seen without judgment.
So, although I wish to share her autism diagnosis, I will hold back. After all, she is just a three-year-old child deserving of love and understanding. For more insights on parenting and navigating challenges like these, you can explore this excellent resource on pregnancy and home insemination.
In summary, my daughter’s journey is one of resilience and hard work. She is a beautiful individual who deserves to be appreciated for who she is beyond any label.