Lifestyle
One evening, while I was out for a stroll with your older brother in his stroller, your dad offered to take over the push. But a wave of uncertainty washed over me; I hesitated, fearing I might not be able to stand if I let go. After a series of tests and consultations, I learned that I have multiple sclerosis (MS), and I was amidst a prolonged episode of symptoms.
As we sat in the neurologist’s office absorbing the diagnosis and discussing the path ahead, all I could think was, “This is serious.” It felt like the ground had shifted beneath me. My mind raced back to a friend’s mother, confined to a motorized wheelchair, relying on her husband for every essential task. That was my understanding of MS, and in that moment, the dream of welcoming you into our family felt impossibly distant. A neurologist even remarked, “Getting pregnant right now would be detrimental to your health.” I understood; at that time, I could barely care for myself, let alone another child. Honestly, I wished for a diagnosis of something else—anything easier to handle.
However, I’ve since educated myself about MS, and I’ve learned to reshape my perspective on this condition. A year and a half later, I’m arguably in better health than I’ve ever been. With the support of my new neurologist and OB, I’ve embraced the possibility of bringing you into this world. As I carry you, I am overflowing with hope.
As we embark on this journey together, I want you to know that we’re ready for the challenges that may come our way. Our family may face difficulties, but we’re equipped to handle them.
First and foremost, we must embrace uncertainty. There’s no way to predict how my MS will progress. I could face serious challenges in the future—like losing my sight, my mobility, or even my memory. But perhaps that won’t happen. Regardless, I hope my experience with MS will instill in you a deep sense of empathy and resilience that can only stem from overcoming adversity.
We can’t foresee what lies ahead. But here’s the secret: everyone is in the same boat. We’re fortunate to have a heightened awareness of this reality. I’ve become adept at focusing on what we can control and making the most of the certainties we have. For instance, I am confident that your older brother, despite being just two and a half, will guide you through life with a perfect mix of wisdom and enthusiasm. He’s an old soul, without a doubt. Your dad is a superhero in every sense—hilarious and ready to tackle any challenge. Together, we make a formidable team, and you can always trust that we will confront any uncertainty with determination, humility, and laughter. We are committed to providing you with the best life possible.
Moreover, we must seize opportunities while we can. I despise running; I never found it enjoyable. But I trained and completed a 5K while I still could. Unlike many other moms who may not consider their health’s future impact, I’m determined to live life to the fullest now. This means showing up at the pool early in the morning because we can swim, or mowing our elderly neighbor’s lawn simply because we’re able to do so. (Just a heads up, we aren’t a family that sits around much!)
Speaking of action, we must advocate for a cause and work tirelessly for a cure for this disease. When I received my diagnosis in 2016, the knowledge surrounding MS was limited. It’s believed that a combination of environmental factors, genetic predisposition, and possibly a virus might be responsible. But no one knows why I developed it or how severe it will become. I sincerely hope that research advances rapidly so that you won’t have to face MS in your life.
While hope is valuable, I’ve learned that it’s not enough. My sister once remarked, “Hope is not a strategy,” and she was right. We need to take tangible steps to eradicate this condition. Fundraising for research, celebrating breakthroughs, and spreading awareness about how MS affects our lives are crucial. I’m dedicated to doing my part, and I look forward to seeing how you and your brother become advocates in the fight against this disease. We need another champion like you by our side.
I am hopeful that by the time you read this, MS will have had little to no impact on your life. But if that isn’t our reality, always remember how deeply loved you are and how inspired I already am to be your mother. You and your brother are my motivation to stay healthy. We are a resilient, optimistic family, and I will do everything possible to pass those qualities on to you. MS does not define me, and I am committed to ensuring it does not define your life either. Together, we can face any challenge. I love you endlessly.
For more information on artificial insemination options, check out this at-home insemination kit. And if you’re interested in understanding more about pregnancy and home insemination, WebMD offers an excellent resource. For additional insights into family health, visit Modern Family Blog.