My husband, Mark, and I have been happily married for nearly 12 years, and in that time, we’ve welcomed six children into our lives over the past seven years. Each day feels like a relentless marathon where we aim to just make it to the end and finally collapse into bed. At this stage, love isn’t characterized by grand romantic gestures or swoon-worthy moments. Instead, it manifests as the small, everyday acts of care that remind us we are in this together. It’s about supporting one another when it’s needed most, truly seeing each other’s efforts, and recognizing the hard work that goes into raising compassionate, loving children. In essence, love during the parenting phase of young kids encompasses far more than candlelit dinners and material gifts.
Here’s a glimpse into what love looks like in this chaotic yet beautiful season of life:
- Love is grabbing that perfect latte for me, even though you despise fancy coffees, because you know they are my little slice of heaven.
- Love means putting the kids to bed so I can enjoy a night out with my friends, catching up on the latest gossip or just enjoying some adult conversation.
- Love is recognizing that when I text you asking how your day is going, I’m really asking when you’ll be home, ideally soon.
- Love is understanding that I need to share my daily ups and downs with my best friends and sisters—every single day.
- Love is discussing our hopes and fears for our children, from playground friendships to developmental milestones, and navigating the parenting journey together, even on the toughest days.
- Love is reminding me that I’m a great mom, especially when I’m feeling overwhelmed and uncertain.
- Love is cleaning out the snack-filled, crumb-covered minivan without being asked or complaining about it.
- Love is accepting my post-baby body and all the extra weight that comes with it.
- Love is texting, “What do we need from the store?” and being patient while I send you a lengthy list of essentials, including wine, diapers, and other must-haves.
- Love is understanding that sometimes, I just need a moment to myself, even if it means locking myself in the bathroom for a quick glass of wine and a chat with a friend.
- Love is jumping up to clean the spilled drinks during dinner so I can actually finish my meal.
- Love is making me laugh until I cry over the silliest things.
- Love means taking on more than your fair share of diaper changes and other messy tasks.
- Love is searching through the pantry at odd hours for the medicine that will soothe our daughter’s discomfort.
- Love is walking through the door and heading straight to the sink because you know I dislike doing the dishes, and you do it no matter how tired you are.
- Love is being willing to wait in long lines for the kids to enjoy their favorite activities.
- Love is offering to help when you sense I have too much on my plate.
- Love is celebrating our daughters for who they are, embracing their uniqueness even when they differ from you.
- Love is snuggling with the older kids until they drift off to sleep each night.
- Love is frequently saying, “I’m sorry,” and meaning it.
- Love is sharing those hilarious parenting memes that capture the chaos of raising toddlers.
- Love is recognizing “The Look” I give you that signals it’s time to pitch in and help out.
- Love is maintaining the yard and planting flowers each season, allowing the girls to join in, even if it slows the process down.
- Love is pushing the kids on the swings and building sandcastles until your arms feel like jelly.
- Love is our family—filled with joy, worry, laughter, fear, and the hard work that comes along with it all.
To my husband, Mark—my appreciation for you knows no bounds. There’s no one else I’d choose to share this journey with.
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Summary:
In this piece, Emma Jennings reflects on the evolving nature of love in a marriage where both partners are navigating the challenges of parenting young children. She emphasizes the significance of daily acts of support, understanding, and teamwork, which form the foundation of their relationship amidst chaos.