Here’s a little tidbit about me: I haven’t penned a single blog entry about marriage since I tied the knot, and there’s a straightforward reason for that—I feel utterly unqualified to discuss it.
My partner, Mark, and I recently marked five years of marriage. While it might seem like a small milestone in the grand tapestry of life, it’s significant to us.
What have I gleaned from these five years? If you’re still with me, let’s dive in.
Over the course of our marriage, I’ve come to realize that my understanding of marriage is still quite limited. All those expectations and idealized visions I had about what a husband should be and how I would be as a wife? Simply unrealistic.
Now, don’t misunderstand me—maybe your marriage is the romantic fairytale you always envisioned. If you’ve been married for a few years and that’s your reality, I’m all ears for your advice!
One of the toughest lessons I’ve learned is that while we may love each other unconditionally, truly liking each other at all times is a different story (believe me, I’ve tried!). And yes, it cuts both ways.
The adorable quirks that endeared us to each other during our dating days seem less charming after a while. We’ve aged, we’ve evolved—sometimes for the better and at times in ways that require improvement.
We’ve faced our share of challenges—some typical, others that I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy. We’re flawed individuals in a flawed marriage.
But here we are at the five-year mark. It’s tough, folks. I won’t sugarcoat it and pretend our marriage is something it’s not. It’s not always a fairy tale filled with butterflies, and it’s certainly not perpetually romantic or blissful.
Yet, it is profoundly real. This man knows every corner of my being—both the good and the not-so-great parts of my soul. He understands my opinions, my judgments, my insecurities, and my past. Even when he doesn’t like everything he sees, he chooses me every day, just as I choose him.
This realization about expectation versus reality feels like a sign of maturity. Or maybe it’s just a step in our ongoing journey. After five years, I can confidently say we’re still navigating this together.
It’s a beautifully challenging adventure to share life with someone who has differing opinions, pet peeves, and interests. Love isn’t always glamorous, but it’s always worth it. Mark is worth every effort, and our marriage is worth the struggles we face.
Each day, we improve a little at this marriage thing—gaining wisdom and becoming more realistic. We laugh, we argue, we love.
This is what marriage looks like five years in. And I wouldn’t trade it for anything.
Here’s to the next five years and beyond, my dear.
For more insights on navigating relationships and family life, be sure to check out our post about couples’ fertility journeys here. Also, if you’re exploring options like intrauterine insemination, the Mayo Clinic offers excellent resources on the subject. For a deeper dive into this topic, visit Modern Family Blog.
In summary, marriage is not always the blissful dream portrayed in movies, but it is a profound and genuine experience, full of growth, challenges, and love.