Dear Officer,
After many years of reflection, I feel compelled to share my thoughts about our brief encounter back in April of 2009. For a long time, I felt ashamed and believed I was to blame for what transpired. Now, I’ve come to understand that the root of this incident lies in biases that we both recognize.
Reflecting on That Night
Let me transport you back to that night. It’s been over a decade, and I suspect you’ve had countless similar interactions since then. At the time, I was in my early thirties, of South Asian descent, and had a clean driving record. I was aware of my appearance, and I’m sure it stood out against your usual traffic stops.
That evening, I attended a fashion show with a friend who designs lingerie, and we enjoyed ourselves. As I made my way home, the roads were slick from the rain, creating a blinding glare from the streetlights. Approaching my regular exit, I noticed road flares ahead but couldn’t see what was beyond the curve due to the barrier. I assumed the flares signaled caution, so I proceeded slowly, expecting an alternate route.
As I neared the exit, I realized it was closed. I attempted to merge, but it was too late; I found myself trapped behind a police vehicle. I remember seeing you engaged in a report regarding a nearby accident. When you approached, your demeanor shifted to one of anger as you demanded to know my purpose for being there.
Discrepancies and Consequences
There seems to be a discrepancy in your report regarding my response. I claimed, “I didn’t realize the exit was closed,” while your documentation inaccurately states that I said, “I don’t know.” It’s perplexing to think you might have misrepresented my words for your case, but I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised. After running my information, which revealed my clean record, you informed me I would receive a ticket in the mail and instructed me to proceed past the two other vehicles.
I felt relieved that your anger didn’t escalate further, as I was already anxious about inconveniencing you. My intention was to contest the ticket, hoping someone would understand my unintentional mistake. I diligently called the county office, expecting a simple ticket to dispute. Instead, I was shocked to receive a criminal court summons with three misdemeanor charges: Careless Driving, Failing to Yield to an Emergency Vehicle, and Passing through Two Emergency Vehicles.
Let me remind you of a few key points. I approached the scene cautiously and yielded to your presence as best as the circumstances allowed. Ultimately, you instructed me to pass through the vehicles. This felt like entrapment. I had no history of erratic behavior or intoxication; my interaction with you lasted mere minutes.
The Haunting Question
Why did you choose to charge me with these offenses? That question haunts me still, revealing the troubling nature of the system we navigate. That summer, I found myself spending countless hours in court, forced to hire an attorney. I began to notice a disturbing pattern: the majority of those in the courtroom looked like me and faced severe consequences. I witnessed another woman, pregnant and frightened, being confronted about potential jail time for a minor infraction. It was a disheartening realization.
Fortunately, I was able to afford legal representation, and all criminal charges against me were eventually dismissed. However, I was coerced into pleading guilty to a lesser offense. Not everyone possesses the financial means or knowledge to navigate such complexities. Many of your “victims” accept whatever plea deals are offered, conditioned to feel powerless.
A Catalyst for Change
Reflecting on that summer, I can say it ignited a passion within me to advocate for those who face discrimination. Your actions stirred emotions I didn’t know I had, and instead of breaking me, they compelled me to rise. By the end of that summer, I was appointed as a Civil Rights Commissioner by our City Council and the Mayor’s Office. You might have thought you were teaching me a lesson, but instead, you catalyzed my journey to empower others who face similar challenges.
I forgive you for not extending the benefit of the doubt that night. You inadvertently contributed to my growth as a proud, empowered woman of color. Should our paths cross again, I hope to show you the power of justice and change.
With resolve,
Your Unexpected Advocate