My first child arrived at the early hour of 2:30 AM. My closest friend, who lives several states away, urged me to call her the moment he was born, regardless of the time. When my husband made that call to share the joyous news, her immediate response was, “I’m on my way!” She drove for five hours just to meet my son and support me.
She spent the entire day with us, brought dinner, and then headed back home. I felt a deep sense of loss after she left, especially since my husband returned to work just two days later. However, my friend made it a point to check in with me daily.
Since I was the first in my circle of friends and family to have a baby, I didn’t have anyone to turn to for answers to all those new mom questions. I was baffled by everything from my changing body to the challenges of breastfeeding. My sister lived nearby, and I had two best friends who visited, but they couldn’t truly relate as they were still childless. They would come, hold my baby, and ask about motherhood, but their understanding was limited.
I lacked a mom tribe for those early years of parenting. I didn’t have anyone to swap babysitting duties with on Wednesdays so I could run errands. I didn’t know any moms who could just pop over with their kids to play. I was oblivious to the concept of a mom tribe, but surprisingly, it didn’t bother me. I always felt fulfilled without attending mom groups or networking with a large circle of fellow mothers.
As my son grew older, I heard more about moms gathering together, and I tried to connect with others. However, as an introvert, these encounters often left me drained rather than uplifted. It wasn’t that the groups or the moms were unfriendly—they were lovely—but I simply didn’t find my place within them. I was quite content spending time alone or with friends who didn’t have children. This meant my kids received more focused attention when my friends visited, and I enjoyed a peaceful break from the chaos of motherhood.
It wasn’t until the birth of my second child and our move to a street bustling with kids that I finally discovered my tribe. Surrounded by other moms and a lively bunch of children, I found myself engaging in long conversations while our kids played together. We shared popsicles, sidewalk chalk, and stories ranging from labor experiences to cooking tips.
While this was a delightful chapter in my life, I know I would have been just fine even without finding a mom tribe. Society places a heavy emphasis on the necessity of having one, but the reality is that not everyone needs or finds their tribe. This doesn’t signify that something is wrong with you. Sometimes, if you’re more introverted, it’s simply not worth the emotional investment to engage with a group that doesn’t resonate with you.
I’ve always appreciated the relationships I’ve built, and I believe the right people come into your life at the right time. If you haven’t yet found your mom tribe, that may change when your children start school or hit their teenage years. But if you’re content spending your afternoons on the living room floor or enjoying coffee with your mom every Tuesday, that’s equally beautiful.
Like many aspects of life, the right connections will emerge when you’re ready for them, whether it’s a large group of moms or a single friend willing to travel five hours to support you. If you’re considering home insemination to start your family journey, check out this excellent resource for more information. And if you’re looking for specific tools, you can explore options like the CryoBaby Home Intracervical Insemination Syringe Kit. For more insights on this topic, visit Modern Family Blog.
In summary, not every mom needs a tribe to thrive in motherhood. Connections can take many forms, and fulfillment can be found in solitude or in the company of those who may not share the same parenting experiences.