Parenting
By Jessica Taylor
Last year, my brother-in-law shared a photo on social media showcasing the mountain of Christmas gifts that filled their living room. The response was immediate: a flurry of “wow”s and a few “oh my”s. I totally get it! Even we were taken aback, wondering if the presents had multiplied overnight. Yet, I couldn’t shake the feeling of being scrutinized. I felt the urge to explain that those gifts were for our family of ten and included many hand-me-downs from my sister’s teenage kids, wrapped purely for fun. But all my explanations felt weak, and I ended up feeling embarrassed about our extravagant holiday celebration.
This time around, I promised myself I would be more restrained. That was my plan back in October. But now, as we inch closer to Christmas, my closet resembles a scene from a heist movie, with stacks of gifts piled high, and it’s a bit overwhelming. I’ve combed through my kids’ wish lists, hoping to find something to return. (Yes, I even created an Excel spreadsheet—go ahead, judge me!) But each time I try to eliminate an item, I remember how much joy each toy will bring. My children are genuinely grateful, and I know they will cherish every single gift.
Recently, I confided in my husband about my concerns regarding materialism. He reminded me that our family isn’t materialistic; we only indulge our kids during Christmas. We rarely buy toys on a whim and often opt for experiences over presents on birthdays. He pointed out that we are instilling the true spirit of Christmas in our children: love, generosity, gratitude, and family time. We have ongoing discussions about the different lifestyles people lead around the globe, making it clear how fortunate we are and why we should give back. We donate both money and items to charitable causes and prioritize family bonding throughout the year.
My husband also loves the idea that our kids will have vivid memories of Christmas mornings filled with excitement and joy, alongside the lessons of kindness and gratitude. I too cherish those memories from my own childhood—ripping open wrapping paper, the thrill of new toys, and the magical belief in Santa Claus. These moments are irreplaceable.
So, why do I still feel guilty about the pile of gifts? Honestly, if no one else knew about it, I wouldn’t feel bad at all. My guilt stems from external judgment rather than my views on Christmas or materialism. Social media is rife with parents sharing their minimalist gift-giving philosophies—some claim their kids only receive three gifts while others have sworn off presents entirely. Many parents criticize those who give too much, labeling them materialistic or irresponsible.
But here’s the truth: how families choose to celebrate Christmas is their own business. Judging another parent’s choices based on a single photograph is unfair. Families like mine, who embrace the festive spirit with gusto, aren’t doing anything wrong. We simply have a cherished tradition of large Christmas celebrations.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a mountain of gifts to wrap up!
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Summary: The author reflects on the joy and excitement of large Christmas celebrations within their family, sharing the struggles of feeling judged for their gift-giving habits. They emphasize that every family celebrates in their own unique way, focusing on instilling values of gratitude and love in their children while creating lasting memories.