In February, my precious daughter found herself in a devastating accident that I will never forget. The sound of the crash reverberated through my mind, an echo that left me in a state of shock. It’s haunting to hear something so catastrophic happen without witnessing it in real-time. What’s more painful? Witnessing the event or only hearing it unfold?
You often think that such tragedies happen to others, to those deemed unfortunate. But then you realize you are not immune to such experiences. A 50-pound mirror fell on my little girl’s head—50 pounds of weight crashing down on her delicate frame. The thoughts racing through my mind were relentless: “I’m a terrible mother. I’ve failed her. I’m no longer a mom.” Those phrases played on repeat as I watched my partner rush down the stairs, cradling our daughter, her tiny body limp and bruised, blood seeping from her nose.
I vividly recall my frantic thoughts: Why did I choose to take voice lessons that Saturday morning? Had I been home, we could have enjoyed a simple walk or shared a cozy reading session instead.
As someone who had longed for motherhood, I never imagined that I would be faced with the reverse of that dream. I had fantasized about the kind of mom I would become and the vibrant personality my daughter would have. What would she look like? Would she inherit my singing talent or her father’s fearless spirit? It’s an unbearable feeling to confront the possibility of losing those dreams.
While I dialed 911, I couldn’t shake the fear that I was losing my little girl. Just a day before, she was dancing and laughing, lost in the joy of Justin Timberlake’s “Can’t Stop the Feeling.” Now, she lay motionless as her father performed CPR.
I remember running into the street, waving down the EMTs, desperate for them to arrive sooner. When I returned indoors, I found my daughter intermittently crying, thanks to the invaluable guidance of the 911 dispatcher who assisted my husband through infant CPR. A short while later, we arrived at the Harborview Medical Center trauma unit, a journey that felt like an eternity.
The EMTs were nothing short of heroes, saving my daughter and, in many ways, saving me as well. Their calm demeanor and professionalism were a source of comfort during the chaos. One EMT even shared his own story of a frightening incident with his son, offering a sense of connection and understanding that eased my anxiety.
The following five days in the hospital were an emotional rollercoaster, filled with medical staff—doctors, nurses, social workers, and psychologists—who became our lifeline. My parents were there every day, providing unwavering support. I owe my gratitude to them for the fact that I’m still a mom today and not recounting a much darker tale.
When we arrived at the hospital, I was overwhelmed by the stark reality of the emergency room. The TV shows I once found entertaining now felt painfully close to my own life. As they took my daughter behind a curtain for evaluation, I found myself frozen, unable to face what lay ahead. The medical jargon being exchanged around me became a blur, and I clung to my prayers—something I had never done before but felt necessary in that moment.
After numerous tests, including a CT scan and MRI, the doctors confirmed that while my daughter had sustained a skull fracture and a contusion on her cerebellum, she would recover. Though she would require physical therapy to regain her ability to walk, we were spared from the worst-case scenarios I had imagined.
I’ll never forget the pediatric ER doctor’s words: “One day, you will look back at this as a terrible event, but you will feel incredibly fortunate.” As we shared the ICU with other families facing heartbreaking situations, I was reminded that, despite the trauma my daughter endured, we were among the luckier ones.
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This experience has reshaped my understanding of motherhood and resilience. I am grateful for every moment I have with my daughter and the lessons learned through this ordeal.
Summary
A mother recounts the terrifying experience of her daughter surviving a serious accident, grappling with overwhelming guilt and fear. She reflects on her journey through the trauma, the support from medical professionals and family, and ultimately, the gratitude she feels for her child’s recovery.