When I first embarked on the journey of parenthood, I had a vision of imparting wisdom and values like confidence, kindness, and a passion for literature. While I’m still striving toward those goals, my children have also picked up some unexpected lessons along the way.
Swearing
Just yesterday, as we were heading to Sunday service, my eldest son, in a moment of frustration, let slip a perfectly timed expletive. My husband and I exchanged glances, torn between chastisement and a sense of pride.
“Wait, what did you just say?” my husband asked, confusion evident in his voice.
“What?” our son replied innocently.
In our household, we don’t maintain a swear jar — frankly, I need my cash for Costco runs and coffee. Instead of labeling them “bad words,” we refer to them as “adult words.” After all, swearing is one of the many perks of being an adult, right up there with enjoying wine and living without a bedtime. I do my best to keep my language in check, but sometimes life throws unexpected challenges my way, like stubbing my toe or encountering a rude driver.
Growing up in a strict household where swearing was a big no-no left me with a certain anxiety about cursing. I remember trying to insert a “bad word” into conversations and failing miserably; my peers noticed my awkwardness. I’m determined that my children will have a smoother transition into adulthood. When I overhear them using “adult words,” I’ll raise an eyebrow and ask, “Where did you hear that?” They’ll roll their eyes and respond, “Mom, please.”
Farting
When I first started dating my partner, he was surprised by my reluctance to pass gas in front of him. I somehow knew he wasn’t ready for that level of intimacy. But when I finally crossed that threshold, his reaction was a mix of horror and disbelief. Did he think it would smell like flowers?
In my family, “toots” were strictly bathroom business. Yet, as I’ve matured, I’ve embraced a more liberated approach. Just the other day, while browsing through a store, I let out what I thought was a silent one in the children’s section.
To my utter embarrassment, it echoed throughout the aisles, and I could have sworn I heard it reverberate off the walls. In a panic, I looked at my sweet 3-year-old rummaging through dresses and quickly asked, “Sweetheart, do you need to use the restroom?” Not my finest moment.
Nonetheless, we’ve cultivated a relaxed attitude towards bodily functions in our household. My kids have no shame when it comes to gas, which can be entertaining, albeit problematic during long car rides or church services.
Dancing
While I may not be the most graceful dancer, my enthusiasm makes up for it. Whenever a favorite song plays, I can’t help but move, and my children are no different. We often break into spontaneous dance parties — whether in the car, grocery store, or even on the sidewalk. It’s like a flash mob but without the coordination.
My eldest son, however, confuses wrestling with dancing, often resulting in playful chaos with his younger brother. Who knows? He might thrive in a mosh pit someday.
Apologizing
Occasionally, my reactions come before my mind catches up, leading to frequent apologies. Initially, I felt guilty about this until I overheard my two middle children preparing for school one morning.
“Move, Oaklee! You’re in my way!” he exclaimed, followed by a momentary pause. “Sorry, Oaklee, I shouldn’t have said that.”
“I forgive you,” she replied, and in that moment, I felt a swell of pride. Recognizing our imperfections and learning to apologize is a valuable skill.
So yes, we continue to read great books and discuss confidence and kindness, but we also embrace the joys of dancing and the realities of life’s little accidents. I cherish my family, quirks and all.
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Summary
Parenting is filled with unexpected lessons, from navigating swearing and farting to embracing the importance of apologies. In this light-hearted reflection, I share the quirks and realities of family life, celebrating our imperfections and the joy they bring.