Whether you’re the parent of a newborn or a 4-year-old, the teenage years are likely on your mind. We all remember our own adolescence (with a shudder), and if you’re currently navigating this challenging phase with a teenager, you might feel like you’re losing your sanity. It’s easy to reminisce about your own rebellious teen phase, and you may find yourself reaching for a fork to eat a slice of humble pie as you reflect on those memories.
I’m currently experiencing the trials of parenting a teenager, and I won’t shy away from saying this is the toughest stage for me so far. Friends on the brink of parenthood often ask how I manage the ups and downs; they can sense the mood swings and the hint of rebellion brewing. Let me tell you, it’s not a walk in the park.
My best piece of advice? Take it day by day. Stay open, nurture them, support them, and instill confidence in them. Let them know they can approach you with their worries about drugs, relationships, school, and friendships. Easier said than done, right?
We all want to provide our children with every opportunity possible as they grow, and that sentiment only intensifies during their teenage years. While older generations may criticize us for “spoiling” our youth, recent findings bring some encouraging news about today’s teenagers. A study published in the Journal of Child Development reveals that teens are waiting longer to engage in sex, date, and drink alcohol compared to previous generations, with the most significant decline occurring in the last decade. So, parents of teens and those gearing up for the teenage years, take heart: it appears we’re doing something right.
Statistics from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention show that the percentage of high school students who reported being sexually active dropped from 54% in 1991 to 41% in 2015. Additionally, dating among high schoolers decreased from 86% in 1979 to 63% in 2015. Alcohol consumption has also seen a decline; while 93% of adolescents had tried alcohol in 1979, that number fell to 67% between 2010 and 2015. Although more than half of teens still experiment with drinking, a 26% decrease is quite notable.
Various factors contribute to these trends. Jean Thompson, the study’s lead author, explains that today’s teens aren’t in such a rush to grow up, drive, find work, or start families. Instead, there’s a stronger emphasis on education, and teens are taking both their academic responsibilities and extracurricular activities seriously, leading them to postpone adult activities. It turns out there’s wisdom in allowing our kids to enjoy their youth.
In the past, adolescents were expected to mature quickly and become self-sufficient, which often resulted in earlier development. Nowadays, with more resources available, teens are capitalizing on these opportunities, which may explain their reluctance to date, drive, or work at a young age. Thompson notes that even in families without a college-educated background, smaller family sizes and a focus on nurturing children have become the norm.
Stephanie Cartwright, a researcher at the Council on Contemporary Families, emphasizes that today’s teens are more conscious of their futures. “They approach life with less reckless abandon than previous generations who might have thought, ‘I’ll leave school and join a movement—what’s the worst that could happen?’” she observes.
While some critics argue that we’re coddling our youth and making them overly dependent on us, the evidence suggests that a nurturing approach leads to healthier, more fulfilled lives without the pressure to rush into adulthood or engage in risky behaviors. And frankly, that’s a victory for parents, our kids, and the generations to come.
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Summary
A recent study indicates that today’s teenagers are delaying sex, dating, and alcohol consumption compared to previous generations. This trend may reflect a greater emphasis on education and a more nurturing parenting approach. The decline in risky behaviors among teenagers suggests that parents are positively influencing their children’s choices as they navigate adolescence.