I witnessed the tumultuous events of the 2016 election, and it became abundantly clear to me why the term “internalized misogyny” exists. It was disheartening to see American women enter polling stations, seemingly ready to dismantle decades of hard-fought progress. I felt a mix of disbelief and anger as these individuals turned their backs on Women’s Equality, ushering us all to a figurative back of the line—where many appear content to remain silent for the foreseeable future. But I refuse to accept that.
After observing these events unfold, I initially felt rage, which eventually morphed into a cold indifference—a protective response, perhaps, but one that shields me from disillusionment. Because honestly, nothing surprises me anymore. Well, that was until a friend recently sent me a link to a particular Facebook page.
“Can you believe this woman?” she asked, which I assumed was a rhetorical question until I clicked the link. The page belongs to “The Transformed Wife,” a title that should perhaps be rebranded as “A Manifestation of Self-Hatred.” It amazes me how deeply this individual seems to internalize oppression.
What her beliefs were before her “transformation” remains a mystery, but her current persona resembles that of a caricatured 1960s housewife—complete with a roasted turkey, an apron, and a perfectly coiffed hairstyle. This image was intended as a joke, right?
Wrong. Enter: The Transformed Wife, who questions why women pursue higher education when they should instead aspire to be “keepers of the home,” living submissively to their husbands. This is not an exaggeration. She genuinely advocates for this “keeper of the home” philosophy, critiquing everyone from ambitious college students to working mothers. I never imagined I would encounter a woman using scripture to validate such regressive ideologies, but here we are.
Her page is a cesspool of dangerous misogyny, cloaked in a twisted version of Christianity that I, as a believer, find impossible to digest. Yet, alarmingly, she has amassed a following.
And if you think it’s hard to believe a woman could endorse such ideas, I’ve got the evidence to prove otherwise. Behold Exhibit A: a justification for tolerating marital rape based on religious principles. Exhibit B questions women’s intelligence and their perceived need to prove something. Exhibit C asks whether a woman should remain at home even if she is more educated than her partner—Spoiler alert: The answer is a resounding “yes,” according to The Transformed Wife.
There are countless more examples, but I have to remember my domestic responsibilities—after all, it’s easy to forget about the turkey sometimes!
I used to question why feminists were so outraged. Now, I understand. With the persistent wage gap, alarming statistics regarding domestic violence, and the staggering costs of childcare, advocating for gender equality can be exhausting.
The painful realization is that sometimes we find ourselves battling against our own gender. Some women are determined to oppress themselves, and sadly, they refuse to go down alone. Misery, it seems, loves company.
I pondered why The Transformed Wife has garnered such a substantial following. The answer is simple: her message resonates with some. Wrapped in relatable narratives, her rhetoric appeals to certain women who find solace in traditional roles.
There are indeed women who thrive as homemakers, supporting their families, and there is nothing wrong with this. To them, I say, “Bravo!” Follow your bliss, moms! Conversely, there are career-focused women whose work brings them joy and fulfillment, and they deserve recognition too.
As any true feminist will affirm, what we all desire is the freedom to pursue happiness in whatever form that takes—without limitations. This includes allowing individuals like The Transformed Wife to share their offensive views. After all, we fought for her right to speak.
Perhaps one day, she will emerge from the patriarchal confines she has embraced. When that day comes, she just might realize that feminists were the ones collecting the keys to freedom while she was busy locking herself away.
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In summary, the existence of individuals like The Transformed Wife serves as a stark reminder of the ongoing need for feminism. While some women may find fulfillment in traditional roles, it is crucial to ensure that all women have the freedom and opportunity to carve out their own paths—whatever they may be.