It was 2 a.m., and my two-week-old was at it again. We were trying to navigate the complexities of breastfeeding, and each latch sent waves of pain coursing through me. My mother had suggested that I take a break and give him a bottle, while his dad was blissfully asleep in another room. My go-to friend, who was a breastfeeding expert, lived over 1,000 miles away and was unresponsive to my late-night texts.
As my son wailed, perfectly in sync with the hours when most people were deep in slumber, I felt torn between tackling laundry or sneaking in a much-needed nap. (Spoiler: I always chose sleep.) The idea of that bottle was starting to look very inviting.
Then it hit me—my friend had invited me to join a Facebook group dedicated to breastfeeding when I was pregnant. “You’ll find it invaluable,” she said. Now, I genuinely felt like I needed it. I opened the Facebook app, located the group, and sent out an urgent cry for help: “HELP! MY BABY WON’T SLEEP, MY BOOBS HURT LIKE CRAZY, AND I JUST CAN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE!”
Within minutes, I received a notification. Someone was responding! A fellow mom, probably also battling the late-night feeding frenzy, reassured me that what I was experiencing—cluster feeding—was perfectly normal for newborns. As long as my baby was having enough wet diapers, everything was likely okay. “Hang in there; it does get better,” she said.
I can’t express my gratitude to that nameless woman, and to social media, which has become a lifeline for many new mothers. While this may not seem like revolutionary advice, as a new mother, I desperately needed that reassurance. The online community can provide support that often eclipses suggestions from well-meaning family, friends, and even medical professionals. Those women, known to us only through their profile pictures and names, are often the only ones who remind us that we can keep going, that it will get easier, and that frequent nursing is par for the course in the early days. They offer valuable tips on latching, boosting supply, and, when all else fails, they recommend consulting a certified lactation consultant for further assistance.
Some members might even be lactation consultants themselves or experienced mothers breastfeeding their second, third, or fourth child, sharing insights from their journeys. The beauty of this online community is its availability. While I did consult a kind lactation consultant a few days later and attended in-person support meetings, none of that helped in that desperate moment when I was unsure where to turn but reluctant to reach for the formula in the cupboard.
Perhaps those who criticize breastfeeding moms for spending so much time “brexting” should inquire about the nature of their discussions. They could be consulting their breastfeeding support group about thrush, wondering if certain vitamin drops could be causing their baby to be gassy, or figuring out when to start pumping before returning to work. Or maybe they’re just keeping themselves awake with lighthearted celebrity gossip as a distraction from their sore nipples.
I wasn’t about to empty my wallet for trendy drinks or supplements that supposedly boost milk supply. The most effective advice I received was simply to nurse on demand or pump every 2-3 hours at work to maintain my supply. My son and I managed to survive that chaotic night, leading to a breastfeeding journey that lasted 2.5 years. My group of breastfeeding friends became my go-to source for all things milk and latching, and they consistently supported me, especially during those late-night crises.
When my second child arrived, he latched on and fed constantly. Thanks to my previous experience, I knew what to expect during those late-night cluster-feedings, and I felt less anxious. So, when 2 a.m. rolled around again, I grabbed my phone, positioned my baby comfortably, and scrolled through my Facebook pages.
“HELP! MY BABY WON’T STOP FEEDING, AND I’M NOT SURE IF I’M PRODUCING ENOUGH MILK!” I typed, also inquiring about diaper counts and latching. Everything seemed fine? “Just keep nursing, Mama. You’ve got this. You’re going to be okay.”
In summary, social media has proven to be an invaluable resource for mothers navigating the challenges of breastfeeding. From supportive advice to a sense of community, platforms like Facebook can turn into essential lifelines during those long, exhausting nights.
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