Mom’s Mental Load: The Most Exhausting Part of Motherhood

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The intricacies of motherhood are often challenging to articulate, especially to those who haven’t experienced it themselves. The daily mental checklist of tasks and responsibilities required to keep a family and household running smoothly can be overwhelming.

Mom blogger Jenna Miller recently expressed these sentiments on her Facebook page, sharing a heartfelt tribute to mothers everywhere, referring to us as “The Keepers.”

“I am the keeper,” she begins. “I am the keeper of schedules, practices, games, and lessons. I manage projects, parties, and meals. I oversee appointments and homework assignments.”

The sheer magnitude of keeping everything in order in a household with children is monumental, often falling on one parent—typically the mother—to take on this role. But it’s not just limited to managing schedules and bills.

Moms are also the ones who mend scrapes and bruises, provide comfort, teach kindness and manners, and maintain peace in the home. No one can soothe a crying child or mediate sibling disputes quite like a “keeper” can.

“I am the keeper of traditions and memories,” Miller continues. “I capture moments through photographs, collect cherished ornaments, and pen heartfelt letters. I am the source of emotional security, navigating through moods and fears.”

If you’re feeling a bit emotional reading this, you’re not alone.

“I carry the weight of worry—both theirs and my own. I manage the good and the bad, the big and the small, the beautiful alongside the challenging.”

The essence of Miller’s poignant post highlights the struggle of balancing the mental and emotional responsibilities that accompany motherhood.

Many of us, whether parents or not, often question our capabilities. “Our only measure of success is the happiness and well-being of our loved ones,” she explains.

Miller elaborates on why being a “keeper” can be the most draining aspect of being a mom. “Most of the time, the responsibilities I carry feel light as air, giving me a sense of purpose. But there are moments when the burden becomes so heavy that I feel submerged, gasping for air,” she writes.

Mothers never truly stop; we are constantly juggling, worrying, and analyzing. It’s no wonder we struggle to find peace at night or calm our own anxieties—we’re too busy tending to the needs of others. The weight of our responsibilities is often “invisible and intangible,” going unnoticed by those around us. Sometimes, we don’t need accolades; we simply want to feel acknowledged.

“My partner and children are loving and supportive,” Miller reflects. “Yet, at times, being the Keeper can feel solitary. It’s a great honor, but it’s also exhausting.”

Motherhood is incredibly fulfilling, yet it can be isolating. The demands of being the family’s anchor can make us feel detached from our previous selves and the world outside. This is a reality of being a “keeper.” Our efforts often go unseen despite being crucial to the family dynamic.

That’s why Miller’s words resonate with so many. “To all the Keepers out there, I see you. I understand the weight of your responsibilities. The invisible work you do—without a paycheck or sick leave—keeps the world turning. I see you and I salute you.”

For more insights into motherhood and related topics, check out this piece on fertility boosters for men or explore other helpful resources like this one on intrauterine insemination.

In summary, motherhood is a complex journey filled with joy and challenges. The mental load of being a keeper can be heavy, often leading to feelings of isolation. However, it’s important to recognize and appreciate the invisible work that mothers do every day.