I distinctly remember visiting a friend’s house when I was around 8 or 9 years old. During that visit, my friend found herself in trouble for something minor. She was taken to another room, spanked, and then returned to play with me, her face flushed and teary. There was no yelling or obvious anger from her parents, yet it left me feeling unsettled. I can’t recall the exact mistake she made, but to me, it seemed like a typical childhood error.
I didn’t grow up in a household where spanking was the norm. The idea of my parents hitting me for any reason felt unimaginable, particularly for something that didn’t even strike me as bad behavior. Despite my young age at the time, my views on spanking have remained consistent. Having never experienced it myself, I’ve never understood its necessity. The notion of hitting anyone, let alone a child, seems inherently wrong. People often justify spanking as a more acceptable form of punishment than, say, hitting a child in the face, but I fail to see the logic. We educate children about physical boundaries, yet we find it acceptable to hit them on the bottom as a form of discipline. It has always struck me as contradictory.
Of course, many individuals grew up with spanking as a common disciplinary practice. Those who experienced it often do not perceive it as harmful, leading them to accept it without question. In fact, many equate spanking with effective discipline and struggle to see how one can raise a well-adjusted child without it. While my personal experience serves as anecdotal evidence that discipline can be achieved without spanking, there exists a wealth of research—over 50 years’ worth—to support the argument against it.
Notably, one meta-analysis published in 2016 in the Journal of Family Psychology examined data from 160,000 children over five decades. Researchers at the University of Texas found that spanking is ineffective at best and damaging at worst. The findings revealed that increased spanking correlates with worsened behavior, heightened likelihood of antisocial tendencies, and increased mental health problems. Spanked children tend to defy their parents more frequently, display more aggression than their non-spanked peers, and encounter cognitive challenges. In essence, spanking fails as a viable disciplinary method.
This was not the first comprehensive analysis to reach such conclusions. A 2002 study that reviewed 88 separate investigations also indicated numerous negative consequences associated with spanking, including strained parent-child relationships and a diminished ability to discern right from wrong. The only fleeting advantage noted was that children may comply with parental requests immediately after being spanked. However, this compliance diminishes over time, rendering that benefit ineffective in the long run.
It’s crucial to understand that the spanking referenced in these studies does not encompass what would be classified as child abuse. The research focuses on what many would consider “normal” spanking. Still, the studies indicate a troubling trend: the more parents spank, the higher the likelihood that some may cross the line into abuse. The distinction between spanking and abuse is not as clear-cut as many believe.
Elizabeth Gershoff, a co-author of the 2016 study, points out, “We as a society think of spanking and physical abuse as distinct behaviors. Yet our research shows that spanking is linked with the same negative child outcomes as abuse, just to a slightly lesser degree.”
Supporters of spanking often defend their stance by claiming, “I was spanked, and I turned out fine,” or “Spanking is not abuse.” Others might assert, “We spank, our kids are well-behaved, and our relationship is strong, so those studies must be wrong.” Some even argue that today’s societal issues stem from a lack of spanking.
Will every child subjected to spanking exhibit these troubling behaviors? No. However, they are statistically more likely to do so compared to those who aren’t spanked. Can children be raised to become responsible, respectful individuals without spanking? Yes. Are some children more challenging to discipline than others? Absolutely. Does that justify the use of spanking? Definitely not.
Just as it took years of research into car accident data for society to recognize the importance of seat belts, we now possess decades of evidence regarding spanking, all pointing to its ineffectiveness. When we know better, we can do better. Well, now we know better. It’s time to apply that knowledge and seek out alternative, less harmful methods of disciplining children.
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In summary, extensive research overwhelmingly suggests that spanking is not only ineffective but also detrimental to children’s development. As we gain a clearer understanding of child discipline, it’s crucial to adopt more constructive approaches that foster healthy relationships and positive behaviors in our children.