Having two kids has been the most rewarding experience of my life, yet it has also solidified my decision not to expand our family any further. Before I became a parent, I often forgot to take my birth control, but now, I’m diligent about it. Every evening, as I prepare for the nightly struggle to put my little ones to bed, I remember to take my pill. However, I’ve come to realize that I might not even need to bother with it, given how infrequently my husband and I find the opportunity to be intimate.
Raising small children is practically its own form of birth control. Between the chaos and constant demands, feeling sexy isn’t exactly on the agenda. Here are a few reasons why:
- Exhaustion
I can’t recall the last time I enjoyed more than six hours of uninterrupted sleep. I’m perpetually tired, and from the moment I wake up, I dream about crawling back into bed. By the time I finally get to lie down, I can barely keep my eyes open. So when it comes to intimacy, energy is in short supply. Sorry, love. - Feeling Unattractive
It’s hard to feel desirable when I can’t remember the last time I showered—it’s definitely been a few days. And let’s not even talk about the areas of my body that have been neglected for far too long. Even when I manage to change out of my comfy clothes and refresh myself, I’m still adjusting to my “mom body.” I’m working on self-acceptance, but for now, touch is off the table. - Real Life Grossness
As parents, we’ve developed a high tolerance for mess. However, some situations are notably unpleasant, like potty-training disasters or that time my child decided to throw up right outside the bathroom. Shifting from cleaning bodily fluids to feeling sexy is quite the mental leap. - Co-Sleeping
Our bed has turned into prime real estate occupied by our kids, leaving us with little room for romance. It’s not like we can easily find other spots around the house either. Sure, we could attempt something in the shower, but honestly, who has the energy for that? (Refer back to point one.) - Lack of Privacy
Even if we manage to sneak away to the bathroom (which sounds oddly romantic), our kids have an uncanny ability to find us. They seem to possess a sixth sense for when we’re trying to have a moment alone. The transition back to “parent mode”—whether it’s helping with a toy or finding a snack—makes it challenging to regain momentum. This phenomenon could be termed Coitus Interruptus.
I’ve heard from many that parenting becomes easier as kids grow, only to face new challenges during the tween and teen years. But for now, we’re in the thick of it. Just the other evening, I attempted to share a kiss with my husband in the kitchen, only to be interrupted by our daughter exclaiming, “My poop looks like a banana!”
While I’m not suggesting that romance is completely dead, it’s certainly taking a backseat to parenting duties. So, if you’re looking for effective birth control, consider the magical powers of small children!
For more insights on family planning, check out this excellent resource about IVF and home insemination. If you’re interested in at-home options, you can also find useful information about artificial insemination kits.
Summary:
Parenting two small children can serve as a natural form of birth control. The exhaustion, the lack of personal time, and the constant interruptions make it challenging for parents to find moments of intimacy. With kids taking over the bed and the bathroom being a no-go zone, romance often has to wait. Parents should embrace this chaotic phase while considering their family planning options.