To the dismay of my own parents, I embrace a bit of colorful language in my household. After a long, exhausting day, there’s nothing quite as relieving as expressing frustrations with a few well-placed expletives. While I strive to be a good role model, my affinity for swearing is simply part of who I am—it’s not changing anytime soon.
With my penchant for colorful language (paired with a dash of impatience and the chaos that comes with parenting), my children are often exposed to a variety of curse words. Yes, they pick it up like little sponges, and yes, they throw it back at me when the moment strikes.
That’s right—my kids swear. They know the “bad” words and use them correctly in context. Whether it’s a frustrated shout of “damn it!” or a giggly middle finger to a sibling, they have a knack for expressing themselves.
While it can get tiresome—like most things kids do—I don’t mind it too much. Swearing isn’t off-limits in our house, and I’m generally unfazed if they mutter a curse when they step on a Lego. After all, who doesn’t feel that way sometimes?
This is typically where the critics might jump in, ready to label me as an awful parent. But hear me out.
I firmly believe in teaching my kids the first rule of swearing: Know your audience. They understand that there are appropriate times and places for such language. Our home is a space where they can be their expressive selves, but they also know that swearing at school—or in front of their younger cousin or grandma—will lead to consequences.
I’ve made it clear that if I receive a call from their school regarding inappropriate language, they will face a serious reaction from me. Just like I wouldn’t let loose a barrage of expletives in a formal setting, my kids need to learn that certain environments have different expectations.
Additionally, I emphasize that words possess power, primarily due to the intent behind them. While words like “shit” or “ass” can be jovial in the right context, insulting someone with mean language is crossing a line.
Interestingly, I find some words—like “stupid” or “shut up”—to be far more offensive than any curse word. We prefer saying “oh my gosh” instead of “oh my god” to respect others’ beliefs, and slurs of any kind are completely unacceptable.
We also steer clear of sexist jokes, even those that may seem harmless, and I keep a close watch on how they treat others. Negative comments about appearance, body size, or fashion choices are not tolerated. Gossip is discouraged, and we strive not to say unkind things behind people’s backs. The guiding principle is simple: Don’t be a jerk.
You might think I’m a lenient parent for allowing my kids to unleash their frustrations with profanity, but I am very strict when it comes to compassion and respect. While I don’t mind them saying “asshole,” I will not stand for them behaving like one.
At the end of the day, my expectation is for them to always be kind, which is not determined by their choice of words. Even someone as saintly as Mother Teresa likely had her moments of colorful language!
For more insights on parenting and navigating these discussions, check out our post on the importance of kindness. And for those interested in family planning, our article on the at-home insemination kit offers valuable resources. Additionally, the Mayo Clinic is an excellent source for understanding pregnancy and home insemination.
Summary:
In this article, Jessica Lane discusses her open approach to swearing within her household, emphasizing the importance of context and respect while teaching her children to communicate expressively. She believes in maintaining a focus on kindness above all and sets clear boundaries on when and where swearing is appropriate.