In a recent scroll through a Facebook group dedicated to parents raising boys, I stumbled upon a post that stirred my disbelief. A mother was venting her frustration about the Disney Channel’s focus on empowering girls, claiming that this skewed attention somehow neglected boys. Many other moms chimed in, echoing her sentiments, and I felt an overwhelming urge to respond. While I can’t recall my exact words, the essence of my reply was clear: being male is often seen as the default for success, while women and girls still require encouragement in a society that too frequently treats them as inferior.
As I prepared to engage further in this critical dialogue, another mother interjected with a statement that gender neutrality and fluid identities were merely constructs aimed at undermining masculinity. At that moment, I knew it was best to step away before my frustration boiled over.
Ladies, let’s get one thing straight: internalized misogyny is a real phenomenon, and it is thriving. You can choose to ignore it, but that will not alter its existence. This conversation is just one small reflection of a much larger issue.
In modern society, particularly in the United States, there is no active war against men or masculinity. Instead, we are witnessing a relentless assault on women’s rights, instigated by those in power and perpetuated by some women themselves. For instance, 53% of white women voted for a president whose actions and words reek of misogyny, even admitting to assaulting women. It’s disheartening that some women argue that men in our society are being unfairly treated based solely on their gender. This is not only perplexing but also alarming.
Returning to those women who supported the sexist policies of our current leadership, they epitomize internalized misogyny. Many expressed sentiments like, “I don’t experience discrimination because I’m a woman, so it must not be a real issue.” This perspective is deeply flawed. Just because your personal experiences provide a shield against misogyny doesn’t mean it’s nonexistent for others, particularly for women of color who face additional layers of discrimination.
The reality is that misogyny permeates our culture, exemplified by figures like Donald Trump, who has a history of reducing women to mere physical attributes. He has made derogatory comments about women who do not fit his ideal, while simultaneously idolizing those who do. And yet, I’ve seen women attempt to justify his behavior by saying it’s “just locker room talk” or “normal guy stuff.” This is where internalized misogyny rears its ugly head.
Have you ever found yourself blaming a victim of sexual assault for their circumstances? If you have, that’s a clear indication of internalized misogyny at work. The misguided notion that a woman’s choices could “invite” assault is fundamentally flawed. No one deserves to be victimized, regardless of their actions or attire.
In one instance, I shared a story about a woman who was assaulted by someone she considered a friend. A comment from a mutual acquaintance suggested that she should have been more cautious with her drinking. This misguided perspective is a classic case of victim blaming, which only serves to protect the perpetrators and perpetuate the cycle of misogyny.
It is undeniably challenging for women to unlearn these ingrained beliefs, shaped by a patriarchal society. However, we must commit to this process. We cannot continue to excuse male behavior or downplay the severity of misogyny. It’s time to confront these issues head-on and acknowledge that internalized misogyny is harmful and pervasive.
Say it with me: Internalized misogyny is real, and it must be addressed. We need to stop placing blame on victims and start holding individuals accountable for their actions.
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In summary, internalized misogyny is a pervasive issue that affects women’s perceptions and interactions in society. It is crucial to recognize and dismantle these harmful beliefs to create a more equitable world for all.