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You bet I share my thoughts about my husband online! Honestly, I find it therapeutic for our relationship.
By April Langston
Updated: Feb. 20, 2024
Originally Published: June 22, 2022
I adore my husband, but let’s be real—our marriage isn’t flawless. We’re content and genuinely enjoy each other’s company, yet I recognize there are healthier relationships out there. I can be passive-aggressive, while he tends to forget the things I tell him. Our ideas of “clean” are worlds apart, and while he thrives on budgeting, the mere thought of it makes me anxious.
Despite these differences, our marriage is not in trouble; it just means we don’t see eye to eye on everything. Interestingly, we rarely post those overly sweet tributes to each other on social media. Sure, we did that when we were first dating, wrapped up in our own little world, but I doubt my husband even remembers his Facebook password now. Experts suggest that constant sharing can often hide insecurities in a relationship, so maybe we’re doing something right!
What I do share on social media, however, is my frustration with him. I’m not just “venting”; I’m diving headfirst into the deep end. I openly air my grievances about my husband, and I enjoy it! In fact, it’s been beneficial for our marriage.
This all began when our son was born. As exhausted first-time parents, we struggled to find our footing. I tentatively posted about the challenges we faced and was surprised by the supportive responses. Many others chimed in, sharing their own experiences of feeling overwhelmed with a new baby and a partner who sometimes seems oblivious. Suddenly, I felt less isolated and reassured that many couples go through similar struggles.
From there, I began to detail the not-so-perfect moments in our marriage, which quickly morphed into me humorously airing my husband’s most infuriating habits. I was buoyed by the positive feedback and soon dropped all disclaimers, opting instead for straightforward complaints.
My husband knows about these posts. In fact, I often read them to him before hitting “publish,” and he’s even helped me articulate some of my thoughts. He’s in on the joke, and it feels good to share these experiences.
I wouldn’t say anything that’s truly awful or untrue. I share how he loves to compete over who’s more tired, how he still forgets where our son’s pajamas are (despite it being the same drawer for years), or how he believes leaving dirty clothes next to the hamper is just as good as putting them inside.
These posts don’t make me feel superior, nor do I intend to shame him. If I thought he’d be upset, I wouldn’t share those stories. Instead, they allow me to express frustrations in a funny way, which helps diffuse any lingering anger or resentment. I often find that discussing these things with others allows me to let go of negative feelings.
Of course, not everyone agrees with my approach. Some people criticize me for speaking poorly of my husband, claiming their perfect partner would never behave this way. Some have even suggested that if my husband truly loved me, he wouldn’t do the things I mention.
But honestly, I don’t believe he allows the recycling to overflow out of malice; he’s just occasionally lazy.
While my methods may not be conventional and might not suit everyone, they work for us, and that’s what matters. And for those who think my husband should leave me for being “awful,” I just turn their comments into memes for fun.
About the Author: April Langston has been navigating motherhood since 2016 and writes for various parenting blogs. You can often catch her candidly sharing life’s ups and downs on Instagram. She’s proud of the time she improvised using one of her son’s diapers while stuck in the car instead of soiling her pants.
Her debut book about the raw realities of the first year of motherhood is set to be published by Union Square & Co. in May 2023. She lives in the San Francisco Bay Area with her husband, son, dog, three cats, and a partridge in a pear tree.
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In summary, I openly share my frustrations about my husband on social media, and it has surprisingly strengthened our marriage. While not everyone agrees with my approach, it allows me to express my feelings and connect with others who face similar challenges.
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