I Advocate for Body Acceptance, and Then I Became a Parent

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I Advocate for Body Acceptance, and Then I Became a Parent.

Navigating a changing body, whether you’re thirteen or thirty, is challenging. Written by Amy Carter Updated: Feb. 20, 2024 Originally Published: June 14, 2022

Today marks the release of my debut graphic novel, “Smaller Sister,” aimed at preteens and focused on the joy and significance of embracing your body as it is. When I began writing this book, I was over two years away from motherhood. Now, as it finally launches, I’m six months postpartum, grappling with my own message of body acceptance again.

“Smaller Sister” narrates a fictional tale inspired by my journey of self-image shaped by my older sister’s struggles with an eating disorder. The protagonist, a middle schooler named Mia, confronts disordered eating due to societal pressures. She battles unrealistic expectations about her appearance and ultimately learns to treat herself with compassion, allowing her to see her worth in a new light.

I drafted the script in 2019 at the age of 28. During that phase, I felt mostly at peace with my adult body, maintaining a balanced routine that I had cultivated since my more tumultuous post-college years. However, creating graphic novels takes time, and by the time I submitted the final artwork to my publisher in mid-2021, I had a myriad of new feelings about my body—primarily because I was five months pregnant.

As “Smaller Sister” reaches bookstores, my adorable son is exactly six months and one day old. In the time since I conceived the idea for this book, I created a whole human. I nibbled on ginger chews to combat morning sickness while sketching and fitting in prenatal yoga classes before workdays spent finalizing the illustrations. Around when I began promoting my book, I underwent a C-section. As I promote my new work, I find myself discussing the key message I want to impart to its audience of 10-14-year-olds: that finding peace and friendship with your body can be far more fulfilling than striving for perfection. Meanwhile, my postpartum body is undergoing transformations and healing from major surgery while I care for this new life. It’s a lot to handle.

I’ve heard pregnancy referred to as a second puberty due to the significant physical and hormonal shifts your body undergoes, and that was true for me. The changes—wider hips, larger breasts, unexpected hair growth, and fluctuating skin—felt strikingly similar to what I experienced at twelve or thirteen. (Except for the breasts! They never made an appearance the first time.) Postpartum, I again faced that unfamiliarity with my reflection and discomfort in my own skin. It’s not that I dislike how I look; I view myself through a more mature lens than I did back in my teen years. However, some changes are permanent, and I’m still getting to know this new version of me.

Even when my old clothes fit, they don’t feel quite right. During exercise, my weight distribution feels different. And the curve of my stomach over my incision scar feels like it belongs to someone else. When discussing “Smaller Sister,” I sometimes feel guilty and insincere. Is it disingenuous to promote self-love and confidence while battling my own waves of self-doubt? Who am I to advocate for self-acceptance when I can’t fully embrace myself?

But perhaps this is precisely what “Smaller Sister” is about—addressing the ongoing, unrealistic pursuit of perfection. As a young teen, I felt pressured to mold myself into an idealized version of perfection. Now, as a new mom, I feel the pressure to view my body as perfect as it is, irrespective of how I appear. Yet there are days I simply don’t feel that way. I realize I will find greater happiness if I can acknowledge those moments of negativity and trust that they’re temporary, but that requires patience, which can be frustrating and humbling.

Whether you’re thirteen or thirty, dealing with a changing body is tough. Having a body at any age is challenging. Maybe I can turn to my own book for support. In “Smaller Sister,” Mia learns to nurture her relationship with her body one day at a time, treating herself with kindness. Approaching my journey as an adult in the same manner isn’t regressing; it’s just another phase of growth.

This serves as a reminder that it’s perfectly acceptable to feel out of place in my skin some days. It will take time to become familiar with my postpartum body. But I look forward to getting to know her.

Amy Carter, originally from St. Louis, Missouri, grew up in southern Maine. After seven years of designing and art directing children’s books, she transitioned to writing her own stories. Now residing in Princeton, New Jersey, with her husband, a college football coach, and their husky mix, Biscuit, she spends her free time reading, running, or experimenting with muffin recipes. Her debut graphic novel, “Smaller Sister,” draws from her experience as the youngest of three sisters.

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Summary: In this reflective piece, Amy Carter, author of the graphic novel “Smaller Sister,” discusses the complexities of body acceptance, particularly in the context of becoming a mother. She shares her journey of navigating body image issues during pregnancy and postpartum, emphasizing the importance of self-kindness and patience. The article serves as a reminder that embracing one’s body at any age is a continuous process, encouraging readers to take it day by day.

Keyphrase: Body acceptance after pregnancy

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