Why I Chose to Discuss My Abortion with My Kids

Navigating essential conversations with our children can be challenging, especially when it comes to sensitive topics like abortion. I’ve always been transparent with my kids about various subjects, so I found it important to share my experience with them when the time is right.

I remember a moment when my young daughter was taking a bath with her baby brother. She curiously pointed to his anatomy and asked, “Why does he have a tail? His front butt doesn’t look like mine.” It was a lighthearted moment, but it made me realize how little I had taught her about body parts, consent, and reproduction. I’ve worked hard to correct that, but I’ve hesitated to address my own abortion, even as I advocate for reproductive rights. With the future of abortion access uncertain, I feel an urgency to bring this topic into our conversations.

A year and a half ago, when I announced my pregnancy to my children, we explored a book called It’s So Amazing! by Robie H. Harris, which covers a range of topics including sex, sexuality, and pregnancy. While my kids were engaged, one brief page on abortion ignited a realization in me: I hadn’t introduced this topic into our ongoing discussions.

Seeking guidance, I discovered What’s An Abortion Anyway?, a valuable resource created by Carly Manes and illustrator Emulsify. This book provides a medically accurate, non-judgmental introduction to abortion for young readers. Carly highlighted that the right time to discuss abortion is when children start asking questions or when it arises naturally in conversation.

Sexual health educator Amy Lang emphasized the importance of open discussions about abortion as part of a broader conversation on bodily autonomy and consent. With one in four women experiencing abortion by age 45, it’s crucial to prepare our kids for this reality. Many children will either encounter this issue personally or know someone who does.

Establishing a trusting relationship is vital when discussing such significant topics. Tabitha St. Bernard-Jacobs, a parenting educator, pointed out that if conversations about abortion have been avoided, it’s essential to engage with children by asking questions to understand the information they’ve received from peers and other sources.

I plan to keep What’s An Abortion Anyway? accessible as a resource for discussions as they arise. Ultimately, whether or not someone personally chooses to have an abortion, it’s essential that we support individuals’ rights to make informed decisions about their bodies.

Years after my own abortion, I find myself reflecting on the importance of self-determination. I want my kids to understand that they have the right to make choices about their bodies and futures. As the landscape surrounding reproductive rights continues to shift, I feel reassured that my children will be equipped to navigate these discussions as they grow older.

Recently, during a neighborhood walk, my daughter asked a thought-provoking question about this topic. It made me consider whether she was ready for this conversation. While I wasn’t sure, I felt at peace knowing that when the moment comes, I will be ready too.

For anyone looking into family planning and reproductive health, resources like Make A Mom’s baby maker kit can provide valuable information. Additionally, Resolve.org offers excellent insights on family-building options that can be beneficial.

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In summary, discussing abortion with children is an essential part of educating them about their bodies and rights. By fostering open, honest conversations, we can help them navigate the complexities of reproductive health and empower them to advocate for themselves and others.

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