Twins Are Adorable, But They Come With a Ton of Work

pregnant woman in yellow flower dress holding her belly

When my partner was expecting our twins, we received plenty of enthusiastic comments: “I’ve always wanted twins!” “Double the blessings!” “Two for the price of one!” Most of these remarks came from people who didn’t have twins or had forgotten the realities of parenting. The truth is, having two children—whether they’re twins or not—doesn’t make parenting any easier or cheaper.

Fortunately, we had friends who were parents of twins, and they kept it real: raising twins is incredibly challenging. They advised us to just focus on surviving the first year and to lower our expectations. This practical advice resonated far more than the dreamy visions of perfectly coordinated outfits. We were already parents to one child and didn’t fall for the allure of picture-perfect twin moments. We knew the journey was going to be tough.

Just as we were about to start renovations to make space for our second child, the ultrasound revealed that we were actually expecting two more babies. Even before they arrived, our twins were already shaking things up. Feeling both #blessed and #unprepared, we quickly sold our house and moved into a new one across the street, all while preparing for the twins’ arrival. Over eight years later, we still have boxes in the basement that remain unopened. We were too busy managing life with twins to tackle anything beyond the essentials.

And when I say essentials, I mean two of everything: cribs, car seats, diapers, clothes—if a baby needs it, we needed double. We had some items left from our first child, but we still had to buy a lot, especially clothes since our twins were smaller at birth. Thankfully, we received plenty of hand-me-downs and weren’t picky; as long as it was functional and inexpensive, we were all in. If the twins happened to wear matching pajamas, it was purely coincidental. Our goal was clean(ish), not cute.

Getting twins in and out of their gear and addressing their needs is a monumental task. If you’ve never changed, bathed, buckled in, or fed two babies simultaneously, I encourage you to try it just to understand how much more work it is than handling one child. While single parenting is undoubtedly hard, managing twins pushed me into a realm of exhaustion I never knew existed.

When both babies are going through developmental milestones at the same time, it can be overwhelming. Take teething, for instance. It was more than just sleepless nights and crying; it involved runny noses, extra laundry, and clingy infants—all while I struggled to stay awake. This pattern continued through self-feeding, walking, and potty training, resulting in a level of fatigue that left me feeling like a walking zombie. There were, of course, joyful moments that we captured in photos, but those were often tinged with the reality that parenting twins is messy and demanding.

My partner and I were—and still are—managing the complexities of raising twins alongside their older sibling. While they may not have sported matching outfits or epitomized the ideal image of twins, they were happy, healthy, and loved. We even managed to leave the house, which felt akin to operating a three-ring circus.

Over time, things have become a bit easier. Now that my twins are eight, they can get themselves ready for the day, shower, and even entertain themselves with creative (if somewhat chaotic) projects. However, there’s still the challenge of duplicate paperwork, conflicting schedules, and ensuring they both have the gear they need for any weather change. Instead of one child complaining about a jacket that doesn’t fit, I have two. We navigate their friendships and try to give them both time with friends while ensuring they have space apart. But it’s a balancing act, and hurt feelings can arise; developing social-emotional skills isn’t always straightforward with twins.

With their growth, however, comes more chaos. My twins are each other’s best friends and their shared energy can feel like a whirlwind. They race through the house, reaching a peak of energy right around bedtime. Life with twins is certainly not for the faint-hearted.

My twins may be loud, exhausting, and definitely not a “buy one, get one free” deal, but despite the chaos, we find happiness in our wonderfully mismatched life together.

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In summary, while twins are undeniably cute, the reality of raising them is filled with challenges and hard work. It’s a rollercoaster of joy and exhaustion, but the experience is uniquely rewarding.

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