53 Hilarious Cleaning Jokes to Brighten Your Day

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Cleaning can often feel like an uphill battle, especially with kids around. As the famous saying goes, “Cleaning with kids in the house is like brushing your teeth while eating Oreos.” Or how about, “Cleaning the house while your children are still growing is like shoveling the walk before it stops snowing”? This timeless quote from Phyllis Diller in her 1966 book, Phyllis Diller’s Housekeeping Hints, still resonates today. These relatable sentiments have turned into popular memes on social media, which is exactly why cleaning jokes and puns have gained such popularity. After all, laughter can make the tedious task of cleaning a lot more enjoyable.

To lighten the mood while you tackle those chores, we’ve compiled a list of delightful cleaning jokes, puns, and one-liners. Once you’ve had a good chuckle, don’t forget to check out our helpful guides on how to clean a couch, wash a down comforter, and get crayon marks off the walls. If your kids are reluctant to pitch in, bring them into the fun by sharing these clean jokes! After everyone has had a good laugh, turn up the music and tackle the housework together.

Ready for some giggles? Here’s what we’ve got:

1. Why did the burglar take a shower? He wanted to make a “clean” getaway.
2. I’m really not into spring cleaning. Honestly, I’m not into summer, fall, or winter cleaning either.
3. What did the broom say to the vacuum? “I’m so tired of people pushing us around.”
4. Salesman: “Ma’am, this vacuum cleaner will cut your work in half!” Woman: “That’s great! Give me two.”
5. I think I’d like a job cleaning mirrors. It’s just something I could really see myself doing.
6. I feel like I should clean the house. I’m going to lay down until that feeling passes.
7. You know what I hate more than a dirty house? Cleaning it.
8. Did you know that in Britain, people prefer brooms over vacuum cleaners? Sorry for the sweeping generalization.
9. Deep thought of the day: When you clean a vacuum cleaner, you become a vacuum cleaner.
10. Why was the broom late? It overswept.
11. Why do basketball players have messy rooms? They dribble everywhere.
12. Did you hear about the brand-new broom? It’s sweeping the nation!
13. Who cleans the bottom of the ocean? A mer-maid.
14. How do you contact the spirit of a recently deceased window cleaner? With a Squeegee board.
15. I start my new job as a street cleaner today. There’s no training — you just pick it up as you go.
16. Did you hear about the messy bed? Yeah, I made it up.
17. Laundry puns aren’t that bad; they’ve just been getting bad press.
18. What did the mom say about her kid who always took the trash out? He was “predisposed.”
19. Do you know which chore is the worst? Vacuuming.
20. What dinosaur never procrastinates? The Prontosaurus.
21. My sister and I argued about whose turn it was to do laundry. In the end, I threw in the towel.
22. What did the frog say as it washed the windows? “Rub-it! Rub-it! Rub-it!”
23. My friend once found a $50 bill in his pants pocket after laundry. I worried he might get caught for money laundering.
24. People worry about their phones spying on them. But the real concern is your vacuum cleaner; it’s been collecting dirt on you for years.
25. Housework won’t kill you, but why take the chance?
26. What do you call an Italian window cleaner? Squ-igi.
27. My dad complained about the dirty plates, and my mom said, “But the cutlery is shining — look on the bright side of knife.”
28. My dad thought he won the argument about arranging furniture. But when he came back, the tables had turned.
29. I made speaker boxes from used laundry detergent bottles. They sound super clean.
30. I’ve been at the kitchen sink all afternoon. Now I feel drained.
31. Have you met the new cook? He’s a knife guy.
32. Dishwashers are funny. They’re hardly ever in sink.
33. When the refrigerator and microwave got married, the toaster gave a brilliant speech.
34. After washing all the clothes, my mom dropped the laundry. I witnessed it all unfold.
35. I’ve decided to sell my vacuum cleaner. It was just collecting dust.
36. Is your refrigerator running? You better catch it before it gets away!
37. What did one sock say to the other in the dryer? “I’ll catch you the second time around.”
38. I tried to declutter my kids’ toys. They weren’t ready to Lego of them.
39. My friend got a Ph.D. in washing machines. Now they call him the spin doctor.
40. What happens when a closet picks a fight? It becomes a war-drobe.
41. Teen: “Dad, I hate my life. It’s like a vacuum cleaner.” Dad: “What do you mean?” Teen: “It sucks.” Dad: “Well, there’s always Roomba improvement.”
42. My cousin wanted laundry puns. I told her I’ve got loads of them.
43. I was upset when my freezer stopped working… But it’s all just water under the fridge now.
44. What did one toilet say to the other? “You look flushed.”
45. What should you do if your daughter gets dirty playing in the mud? Just washer and dryer.
46. What did the mother broom say to her baby broom? “It’s time to go to sweep!”
47. What’s one way to turn a mom cleaning into a raving maniac? Tell her, “You missed a spot!”
48. A man walks into a vacuum cleaner store. He asks to speak to the manager. When she arrives, he says, “Oh, something’s wrong — everything you sell sucks.”
49. The highlight of my week was my new vacuum cleaner. Things are picking up!
50. Speaking to his son, a man vented about his job at the dry cleaners. After listening, the son said, “Dad, I think it’s time to throw in the towels.”
51. What’s a favorite song for someone who loves to clean? “Another One Bites the Dust.”
52. Mom: “Honey, your house is a wreck! Want me to help you clean it?” Adult daughter: “My house isn’t messy. I’ve set up obstacles for burglars.”
53. Disney may have given me unrealistic ideas about love, but I’m more annoyed that woodland animals haven’t helped me with housework. My house is so messy, it looks like I’m losing a game of Jumanji.

For more about cleaning and organizing your life, you can check out this helpful resource on family-building options. And if you’re interested in home insemination kits, you should visit Make a Mom for more information.

Summary:

This article presents a collection of 53 light-hearted cleaning jokes and puns that can bring laughter to the often tedious task of housework. From clever one-liners to playful puns, these jokes are sure to amuse everyone in your household. After enjoying some laughs, check out additional resources on cleaning and home organization.

Keyphrase: cleaning jokes

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