Licensed Counselor Alex Reid Discusses Why Body Positivity Is Important for Men, Too

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As a plus-size individual who doesn’t fit neatly into the mid-size or smaller fat categories, I have some reservations about the mainstream body positivity movement. I’ve addressed this before and will likely do so again. It’s disheartening to see that much of the “body positive” content that gains popularity primarily focuses on making conventionally attractive cisgender heterosexual individuals feel better about their perceived imperfections. A significant portion of these narratives comes from average-sized individuals reassuring others in similar situations that they aren’t truly fat by sharing images of their skin folding or close-ups of stretch marks.

This movement has its roots in the fat liberation movement of the 1960s, intertwined with feminism and racial justice, advocating for the rights of marginalized bodies, demanding equal pay, adequate healthcare, and altering the conversation around fat bodies and health. When the most marginalized are excluded from the conversation, those who need it most do not benefit.

Men are often left out of the body positivity narrative, which is a real shame. While it’s clear that women face more unrealistic beauty standards—pressured to be slender, youthful, and adhere to near-impossible beauty routines—men also grapple with their own body image issues. It’s essential to recognize that, on an individual level, men can struggle just as much as women to feel comfortable in their bodies.

Licensed Counselor and body-positive TikTok creator Alex Reid, MA, LPC, understands this struggle intimately. He utilizes his platform to promote mental health awareness and body acceptance, coming from a unique perspective as a mid-size male mental health professional.

“A lot of people with thin privilege use body positivity to build their platforms and expand their audiences,” Alex explains. “I’m not dismissing anyone’s personal experiences, but people tend to listen to those who benefit from thin privilege.” While Alex acknowledges that he sometimes enjoys the advantages of thin privilege, he also experiences the challenges that mid-size individuals face, such as difficulties finding clothing that fits properly.

“In my experience, I fall into that mid-size category—it’s a constant struggle. When I tried to find a crop top for a themed video, it felt like an endless quest. I finally found one on Etsy for $40 due to the ‘extra fabric’ needed for my 2x size,” he laughs, reflecting on the challenges of shopping for clothes as a mid-size man. “I’m stuck in between sizes. Everything is either too small, causing buttons to pop, or far too large, making me look like I’m wearing my dad’s suit.”

As a high school athlete and theater enthusiast, Alex often found that his larger body impacted his opportunities. He was frequently told he would be perfect for lead roles if only he lost weight. “I was told I had the ideal voice and energy, but I wouldn’t fit the mold of the waif-like ingenue,” he recalls. Coaches would prioritize appearance over athletic ability, adding to the pressure.

“I’ve faced multiple eating disorders, and I can remember being just ten years old when family, friends, and coaches told me to lose weight,” he shares. At home, he dealt with more criticism than support, leading to intense feelings of shame without guidance to make peace with his body.

“The first step in my body positivity journey was mending my relationship with food. As a therapist, I recognize that the way we cope and celebrate should not be the same, as it can confuse our minds. It’s vital not to use food as a means of escape,” Alex explains.

He is open about his past struggles with body image, recounting, “No matter how small I got, I still found flaws. Even at a 32-inch waist, I thought, ‘This hangs here, this sags there.’ I would scrutinize myself in the mirror, zooming in on every perceived imperfection.”

Encouraged by fitness friends to focus on his body image, Alex found himself trapped in an isolating cycle, feeling that boys didn’t suffer from eating disorders. When he finally confided in his parents about his struggles, he was dismissed, as they believed boys didn’t face these issues. This experience fuels Alex’s passion for sharing his perspective as a man.

“It’s societal, communal, familial,” he explains. “Men experience body positivity differently, and it’s vital to acknowledge that their struggles exist too.”

As a member of the queer community, Alex has noticed that negative body standards can also emerge within queer spaces. “Attractiveness, especially among gay men, is often defined by unattainable superhero-like standards. This heteronormative ideal creates an environment where acceptance hinges on unrealistic expectations,” he states.

He aspires to see a shift in these standards, urging, “Live authentically in your body. If you want to change for yourself, that’s one thing, but never do it to seek love or acceptance.” Alex emphasizes that genetics play a significant role in body shape, and not everyone can conform to Hollywood’s ideals. The pressure of unmet expectations affects men too.

“Health experts universally agree that excessively low body fat is not healthy. It’s dangerous to spread the notion that less fat equals better health,” he asserts.

In his role within the body positivity movement, Alex is mindful of not overshadowing women’s voices. “I wholeheartedly support women in their efforts within the body positivity movement. Their work is transforming society’s perceptions, showing that women are more than their physical appearance,” he explains.

However, he believes that body positivity is equally important for men. “I appreciate that women lead the body positivity conversation on social media, but it’s challenging to find male voices in that space,” Alex says. “I aim to be that voice.”

For more insightful discussions on body positivity, feel free to check out this blog post or explore resources on pregnancy and home insemination at the CDC. Additionally, for information on artificial insemination, you can visit Make A Mom.

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In summary, Alex Reid emphasizes the importance of including men in the body positivity movement. While women often face more significant societal pressures regarding body image, men also struggle with their self-perception, and it’s crucial to acknowledge and support these experiences. The journey toward body acceptance is universal, and everyone deserves to feel comfortable in their skin.

Keyphrase: body positivity for men

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