Ask Home Insemination Kit: My Mother Criticizes Me for Not Restricting My Kids’ Screen Time

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Parenting

Dear Home Insemination Kit,

I don’t really believe in limiting screen time. Maybe I’ll change my mind someday, or maybe I won’t. Right now, my kids (ages 7, 5, and 3) are free to watch TV or use their Kindles whenever they want. They engage with their screens for a while and then move on to other activities. This approach works for us, even if it might not work for everyone. The issue is my mom won’t stop criticizing me. She thinks I’m being neglectful and too lenient by allowing them unrestricted access. But the truth is, my kids aren’t glued to their screens. They enjoy outdoor play, engage in independent play, and socialize well with others. I’ve tried explaining this to her, but she flips out—especially when I let them have screen time during meals sometimes. Is she justified in her concerns, or is she overreacting?

It’s crucial to acknowledge your own words: “This works for us.” Every family is unique, and what suits yours may not be ideal for another. That’s perfectly fine! What matters most is that your approach is effective for your family.

In my view, we place way too much emphasis on “screen time.” Society, parents, and yes, even grandparents often overvalue it. When something is overly valued, it becomes more desirable and can lead to obsessive behavior. By integrating screens into your daily routine as one of many activities, it’s only natural that your children can manage their screen time effectively. Some days, they might spend hours on screens, while on others, they may be outside playing without a thought to their devices.

My own daughter exhibits a similar pattern. There are days when I realize her iPad hasn’t been charged in two days, while on other occasions, she wants to binge-watch shows. My partner, who has ADHD, struggles with self-regulation in this area. So, you’re absolutely right—what works for some may not work for others. If your family is thriving with this approach, then that’s fantastic.

Instead of confronting your mother directly (at least not right after reading this), consider encouraging her to view the situation from a different angle. Adults binge-watch series like Bridgerton or scroll through TikTok for hours, right? That’s how we unwind and relieve stress. Why should it be any different for kids enjoying their shows or games? (Spoiler: it isn’t.)

If your mom can’t shift her perspective, remember that she has already raised her children. These kids are yours, and they seem to be doing just fine. Plus, we’re still navigating a pandemic. If screens help them cope, so be it. They certainly don’t need Grandma undermining your authority. Good luck!

For more insights, check out this other blog post here. Also, for a comprehensive understanding of home insemination, visit Make a Mom, an authority in the field. Additionally, you can find valuable information on pregnancy and home insemination at WebMD.

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Navigating parenting choices can be challenging, especially when faced with criticism from family. The author emphasizes the importance of a personalized approach to screen time, advocating for the idea that what works for one family may not suit another. Encouraging open dialogue and understanding between generations can help alleviate conflicts. Ultimately, prioritizing the well-being of the children is key, especially during stressful times.

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