I Was Named ‘Class Clown’ in High School, and Honestly, Some Things Never Change

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I attended an all-girls high school in the late 1990s. It was a place known for its rigorous academics and comprehensive programs, preparing us to become influential and accomplished women. After four years filled with learning and friendships, our senior class received a survey for superlatives. I was an average student; taking academics seriously was never my strong suit, so “Most Likely to Succeed” was out of the question. I didn’t have the best hair, nor did I throw the biggest parties. I wasn’t on track to become president or end up on a soap opera. I thought of myself as just another face in the crowd. Turns out, I was completely mistaken.

When summer ended, I picked up my yearbook and flipped through its pages, reminiscing about my time at SJA. As I reached the senior section, I scanned the superlatives, nodding along with most of the choices. I was not expecting to see my name there. And then it hit me: Class Clown – Lisa Harper. What?!

How was I supposed to explain this to my parents? “Don’t worry, your investment in my education wasn’t wasted. I promise I’ll do well in college. Yes, I am just as surprised as you are!” But I truly was shocked. The more I thought about it, the more I realized I was indeed that girl. Over the past four years, I had found myself in various amusing situations that might have led others to think I was a bit of a troublemaker.

Perhaps “troublemaker” isn’t the right term. I didn’t cause chaos; I just made things a lot more entertaining. Like that one time during lunch when aggressive geese invaded our outdoor dining area. I was walking to find some friends when one of them started to squawk at me. Following instinct, I turned and ran while screaming. That goose chased me down and, to my horror, bit me right through my skirt!

Getting bitten by a goose is unfortunate, but performing for a few hundred students enjoying their lunch? That elevates the experience to a whole new level! It was like a live comedy show featuring me and a hostile bird. I surely deserved an award for that performance.

Another memorable moment happened in my chorus class, where snacks were strictly forbidden. I adored that class and my teacher, but I tended to be tardy. One day, I dashed into the class late while chewing on some Bubble Yum. My teacher caught me and asked, “Lisa, are you chewing gum?” Without thinking, I responded, “No, sir, it’s an appetite suppressant!” The room erupted in laughter, leaving my teacher speechless. I didn’t mean to be cheeky; it just slipped out.

Then there was the time I slipped on a banana peel in the hallway. Yes, I actually went flying and landed right on my backside, laughing so hard that I may have had a little accident. The more I reflect on these moments, the more it all makes sense.

As I’ve grown older, my penchant for clowning around hasn’t faded. I still find myself in ridiculous situations, and now I share them with the world online. Have you ever driven to Target wearing mismatched pajamas, only for your newly potty-trained child to announce an urgent bathroom need? I have!

Exercise isn’t my thing, but I’ve been a huge fan of Richard Simmons since I was 15. I even convinced my mom to take a day off work so I could meet him at a discount store. I was a blubbering mess when he walked in, and the entire school found out. (This probably contributed to my Class Clown title.) Fast forward a few years, and I took my newborn son to meet him as well, all while continuing to do his routines until I injured myself doing “Sweatin’ to the Oldies.” Yes, my obsession with Richard Simmons ended in surgery — not from CrossFit, but good ol’ Richard.

Just last summer, we took the kids to Disney World for an unforgettable vacation. As we posed for a family photo in front of the castle, my bra decided to fail me, bursting open and leaving me in quite the predicament. With my 38Gs free-falling at the happiest place on earth, I headed to first aid while grabbing a Disney photographer for a quick snapshot. What a memory! And for the record, 12 safety pins can save the day.

Now that I’m 42, I see no signs of my clownish antics slowing down. This behavior is ingrained in me; you can’t teach an old dog new tricks. So if you spot me at Starbucks in my pajamas, just know there’s a good story behind it. And if you’re curious, you can check my Facebook later for the details. Oh, and that time I knocked over an entire display of Pringles at Sam’s Club? Totally not my fault.

Someday, I’ll share the real story behind that.

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In summary, being voted ‘Class Clown’ in high school was a surprising honor that accurately reflected my knack for turning ordinary moments into entertaining escapades. This trait has only evolved over the years, and I continue to share my amusing life experiences, giving others a chance to laugh along with me.

Keyphrase: Class Clown High School Memories

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