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Hi, I’m Alex, and I am infuriatingly late on a regular basis. Whether it’s meetings, phone calls, or catching up with friends for drinks, I’m always running behind. I also tend to send birthday cards late and take my time responding to emails. Picking up my kids from practice? Yeah, I’m late for that too.
No amount of phone alarms or reminders seems to do the trick. I’ve tried all the strategies, but despite my best efforts, I consistently find myself arriving late.
Lessons from My Upbringing
Growing up, I was taught to value punctuality. My father, a dedicated volunteer coach, often reminded us that “If you’re five minutes early, you’re on time; if you’re on time, you’re late.” Unfortunately, I’m not just “on-time” late; I’m late-late. Sorry, Dad!
To clarify, I’m not excessively late; usually just 5-10 minutes. Yet, this still frustrates my family — and me too. It’s stressful and embarrassing, leaving me feeling out of control while everyone else seems to manage their time perfectly.
Understanding Chronic Lateness
Many people hold the belief that those who are often late are simply selfish or lazy, but that’s not the case. Our brains function differently. According to BBC, psychologists suggest that personality traits, including a tendency toward optimism, contribute to chronic tardiness. Philippa Perry wrote in the Guardian that “Late people often have a sunny outlook.” We may be overly optimistic about how much we can accomplish in a limited timeframe.
For many, struggles with transitions can lead to tardiness. Personally, I find it challenging to shift my focus from one task to another. When I’m deeply engaged in something, it’s nearly impossible to pause and switch gears. So I procrastinate until it’s panic time.
Additionally, individuals may struggle with time perception. In a 2001 study by Jeff Conte, a psychology professor at San Diego State University, participants were asked to estimate a minute’s passage without a clock. Type A individuals tend to believe a minute has passed around the 58-second mark, while Type B individuals (often more creative) estimate closer to 77 seconds. I personally clocked in at 110 seconds because I got distracted!
Anxiety and other mental health issues can also play a role in chronic lateness. Anxiety can lead to avoidance of certain situations, while low self-esteem might result in extra time spent double-checking work. For those dealing with depression, low energy can hinder motivation to be punctual.
My Personal Struggles
In my case, my ongoing lateness stems from many of these factors. I’m overly optimistic about how long tasks will take, whether it’s commuting or logging onto a Zoom call. I always assume that traffic will be light and that every signal will be green, only to be surprised when reality doesn’t match my expectations. I also find transitions difficult, which contributes to my late arrivals at meetings and social events.
Seeking Understanding
While we may seek understanding and patience from those waiting for us, it often falls short of our hopes. To combat chronic lateness, experts recommend setting alarms, adjusting commute estimates, avoiding multitasking, and heeding the advice my dad shared all those years ago.
For those of us who are habitually late, making a conscious effort to arrive early might just help us show up on time. Or at least not as late.
Additional Resources
For more information on home insemination options, check out this insightful post on home insemination kits. And for a comprehensive guide, visit Make a Mom, an authority on this topic. If you’re looking for additional resources on pregnancy, Healthline is an excellent place to start.
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Conclusion
In summary, being chronically late is often more of a challenge than a choice. It stems from various psychological factors, including optimism, difficulty with transitions, and even anxiety. Understanding these underlying reasons can foster empathy towards those who struggle with punctuality.
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