Stop Pressuring Teenagers About Their College Plans

My son graduated from high school this past June, and for years, he has faced the relentless question: “Where are you going to college?” It doesn’t seem to matter if the person asking is a family friend or just someone I met while out shopping; everyone is fixated on his college plans, as though there are no alternatives to pursuing higher education.

To me, this is akin to asking a newlywed couple when they plan to have children, or inquiring about job prospects from someone recently laid off — it’s really none of your business. Such narrow-minded questions imply that there’s only one acceptable path in life.

Not every high school graduate is ready to dive into college immediately. The pressure can be overwhelming, and some teens simply need a moment to breathe. There are numerous avenues to explore after high school, and it’s beneficial for our children to have a plan. Imagine if we started asking graduates about their travel plans, career aspirations, or if they intended to enlist in the military. Sounds odd, right? Yet, college is the default topic of discussion, as if it’s a foregone conclusion.

Currently, my son has no plans to attend college. He’s still in the process of figuring out what he truly wants to pursue before committing to several years of study. I believe this is a wise approach. He’s not rushing into a decision that doesn’t feel right for him.

Among his friends, there’s a variety of paths: one is enlisting in the military, another is pursuing a career in interior design, another is studying engineering, one is entering an apprenticeship to learn shipbuilding, and another is aiming to advance in his retail job. Despite their different trajectories, they all get asked the same tiresome question: where are you going to college? Instead of inquiries like, “What will you do after high school?” or “What are your next steps?” or even “What will bring you happiness in life?”

While some teens can humorously respond, “I’m not going to college because it would be a disaster for me,” many feel the weight of expectations pushing them toward college — even if it’s not feasible for them. Some students lack the necessary support to navigate the financial and logistical hurdles of college applications, which can be daunting.

I know a 20-year-old who faced this exact dilemma. After taking a year to work and save for college, he earned a scholarship for track, but struggled to maintain his GPA due to the demands of work and athletics. Ultimately, he had to leave school without a degree and went back to working. He was constantly asked when he would return to college, which only added to his stress. Yet, through this experience, he discovered a passion for masonry. He thought, “Why not pursue this now and avoid debt?”

While many teens aspire to attend college, it’s crucial to recognize that there are numerous viable paths available. My son is thriving in a trade, earning more than I did with a four-year degree that I’m still paying off.

When adults repeatedly ask teens about their college plans without considering alternative routes, it can be frustrating and only adds to the existing pressure. We need to stop assuming that college is the next step for every graduate. This seemingly casual question can weigh heavily on their minds and affect their outlook on the future.

So, let’s change the narrative. Instead of asking where they plan to go to college, let’s ask questions that encourage them to think about their aspirations and dreams. A simple shift can greatly impact their confidence and perspective on their future.

For more insights, check out this article that offers a broader view on planning for life after high school. Additionally, if you’re seeking expert advice on home insemination options, visit Make a Mom for valuable information. Also, for those considering pregnancy options, NHS is an excellent resource.

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Summary:

Teens face immense pressure regarding their post-high school plans, particularly about attending college. This article highlights the need to shift the conversation from college-centric questions to inquiries that explore a wider range of options and aspirations. It emphasizes the importance of allowing young adults to discover their paths without the burden of societal expectations.

Keyphrase: Stop Pressuring Teenagers About College

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