The Impact of Perfectionism on Mental Health

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I vividly recall the first time I felt the overwhelming pressure of perfectionism. I was just a child, around five or six years old. With my curly blonde hair neatly braided down my back, I sat in Ms. Thompson’s classroom, eagerly awaiting the return of my spelling test. The walls were decorated with big, bold letters and a large map. When my test was finally handed back, I was devastated to see red marks all over it. I had received a B. For a straight-A student like me, this was catastrophic. I gasped, my breath quickened, and I burst into tears.

Concerned, my teacher spoke to my parents about my perfectionist tendencies. “You should be aware,” she advised. However, both my parents and I dismissed it; I was too young to understand perfectionism, and they viewed it as a commendable trait. I believed striving for excellence was inherently positive. What could go wrong?

As it turns out, quite a bit. Perfectionism is an intense struggle that can significantly affect our mental health. According to an article on HeadStuff, “Perfectionism is a complex beast, encompassing various dimensions.” It involves aiming for flawlessness, setting excessively high standards, and reacting harshly to mistakes. Perfectionists often subject themselves to severe self-criticism when they fall short of these lofty expectations.

I know this all too well. I frequently feel inadequate, both personally and as a parent. I am overly critical of my work, and if I make a mistake—like losing my temper with my children or missing a deadline—I often fall apart. I tremble, I cry, and panic overwhelms me. The reason is clear: perfectionists can be their own harshest critics. “Good” is never sufficient. Furthermore, research has identified a correlation between perfectionism and various mental health disorders. I can personally attest to this, as I cope with bipolar disorder, anxiety disorder, and PTSD.

HeadStuff states, “Perfectionism is a risk factor for numerous serious mental health issues.” Perfectionists may feel inadequate and worthless, failing to recognize that their standards are unreasonably high. Instead, they internalize the belief that there is something fundamentally wrong with them, which can lead to low mood, anxiety, or even suicidal thoughts. A 2013 study found that over 70 percent of young people who died by suicide typically held excessively high expectations for themselves.

The good news is that being a perfectionist isn’t a life sentence. There are strategies to manage perfectionism and adjust your mindset. The first step is acknowledging your perfectionist thoughts and understanding how they negatively affect your life. “The first step to overcoming perfectionism is becoming aware of your perfectionist thoughts and tendencies,” suggests an article by Oregon Counseling. Taking time to reflect on your thought patterns can be enlightening; jotting them down may help clarify them.

Additionally, focusing on positive aspects and setting more realistic goals can be beneficial—though this is often easier said than done. Allowing yourself to make mistakes is crucial. “When we permit ourselves to err, we realize that failure isn’t catastrophic. Mistakes provide opportunities for learning and growth,” the article emphasizes.

Despite these insights, changing one’s mindset is challenging, especially for those with perfectionist tendencies. Seeking help from a mental health professional can be invaluable in quieting that inner critic and establishing achievable expectations. “Once we understand how perfectionism influences our lives, we can reshape our self-talk and experience reduced stress and increased confidence in pursuing realistic goals,” Oregon Counseling concludes.

For more insights on this topic, check out another one of our articles here, and for further information about home insemination, visit Make A Mom. If you’re considering fertility treatments, March of Dimes is an excellent resource.

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Summary

Perfectionism can significantly impact mental health, leading to feelings of inadequacy and severe self-criticism. Recognizing perfectionist tendencies and learning to set realistic expectations are essential steps in managing its effects. Seeking professional support can also aid in overcoming these challenges.

Keyphrase: Perfectionism and mental health
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