Trigger Warning: Sexual Assault
artificial insemination syringe
I began my modeling journey at the age of 17. Becoming a model was never my aspiration, but when the chance arose, I seized it. I heard it was lucrative, and I needed funds to leave my home country of Poland.
During my first meeting at a modeling agency, I was instructed to strip down to my underwear in front of strangers who pointed out everything they perceived as “wrong” with me. They labeled it a standard evaluation, but it felt dehumanizing. Unsurprisingly, I was told I needed to lose weight.
“If you’re not a walking skeleton, you’re too fat.”
Contrary to common belief, modeling is far from an easy career. The challenge doesn’t stem from the posing, which takes some skill but isn’t rocket science; it arises from the unrealistic expectations and the grim realities of the industry. Much goes on behind the scenes that people often overlook.
I was already underweight when I signed with my agency, yet the 2010s were particularly harsh regarding beauty standards. The mantra “nothing tastes as good as skinny feels” was still prevalent, and it feels like we haven’t entirely escaped it. My contract even stipulated that I had to lose and maintain a specific weight — the legality of that is questionable. Eventually, I did lose more weight. At my lowest, I weighed around 100 pounds at 5’8”. Despite being underweight, I was often categorized as a “bigger” girl during castings. I frequently heard that my hips were too wide, my backside too large, and my legs not skinny enough.
Many girls I worked with subsisted on just an apple or two daily. During long photoshoots that could stretch from 12 to 14 hours, the only food available was a tiny salad, a piece of fruit, or, if we were fortunate, a slice of pizza without toppings.
Welcome to the Dark Side
I dreaded the castings where strangers deemed me “fat,” but it was an unavoidable part of the job. Fortunately, I had a steady stream of work as a commercial model — appearing in commercials, product packaging, and catalogs — which was a safer niche than high fashion or lingerie, where many of my peers ventured.
The modeling industry is anything but fair or predictable, even when you are signed with one or more agencies. Securing well-paying work is not guaranteed. For every successful model like Kate Moss or Karlie Kloss, there are thousands struggling to make it, often facing dismal outcomes.
This reality drives some models to seek alternative means of income. What may start innocently, such as escorting or providing the “girlfriend experience,” can quickly escalate. Some friends of mine, sent on assignments to Taiwan, China, or Japan and facing rejection after rejection, found themselves exploring these avenues. Although our agency did not endorse such actions, they also didn’t condemn them, leaving it murky.
If you wanted to make good money but weren’t thriving in castings, getting “creative” became necessary.
Models Are More Than Just Clothes Hangers
In addition to unrealistic expectations and questionable practices, it wasn’t uncommon for models to face groping, drugging, or even sexual assault while on the job. Some photoshoots openly offered drugs to models. I had my share of uncomfortable experiences throughout my modeling career.
This troubling behavior often stems from the perception that models are not “human.” We are seen as glorified clothes hangers, objects to be undressed, admired, and ultimately discarded when our beauty fades. While there can be a sense of prestige that accompanies being a model, it rarely translates to better treatment. In fact, I often felt that men treated me worse while modeling. They seemed enamored with the idea of me, not me as an individual. I was not viewed as a person but rather as an accessory to flaunt.
And the stereotype that “models are dumb” is laughable. Many models, including me, harbored other dreams and aspirations beyond being just an object. We saved money from modeling to fund our education or were already studying while working, which I eventually did.
No, I Wouldn’t Do It All Over Again
After I “retired” from modeling at 23, I began to gain weight and finally reached a healthier state. Yet, the years of being told I was “fat” left a lasting impression. Looking in the mirror often brings dissatisfaction, reminding me of all the negative comments about my body and face.
It took time, but I eventually realized that I regretted my modeling career. While it provided good financial returns and helped me achieve my dream of studying abroad, I’m not sure I would choose that path again. I could have found healthier ways to pursue my goals.
Many aspects of the modeling industry left a sour taste in my mouth. It preys on vulnerable young girls, often minors, who are unaware of the realities they’re stepping into. It turns a blind eye to the unethical situations that occur and encourages eating disorders while neglecting the mental health of its models.
I’m uncertain if the industry has changed since my time in it. It seems like the only significant shift is the rising importance of social media fame, with agencies now displaying Instagram follower counts alongside model photos. The body positivity movement has led to more plus-size models, but skeletal figures are still in high demand. Unfortunately, most mainstream brands and high fashion houses prioritize thinness over the diversity of body shapes and sizes.
We don’t discuss the toxic nature of the fashion and modeling industry enough — and we should. Young girls are exploited for their beauty, often damaged in the process, only to be discarded when that beauty fades. There’s nothing acceptable about that.
If you’re interested in more insights on this topic, check out this blog post for more stories. Additionally, if you’re looking into options for becoming a parent, this resource is an authority on home insemination. For further information on pregnancy and fertility services, visit this excellent resource.
Summary
The modeling industry can be an exploitative and toxic environment, especially for young women. From unrealistic beauty standards to unhealthy practices and experiences of objectification, the consequences of working as a model can be damaging. While some may find success, many struggle with the emotional and physical toll the industry can take.
SEO Metadata
Keyphrase: Teenage Modeling Experience
Tags: [“home insemination kit” “home insemination syringe” “self insemination”]