I Shared a Paddle Boarding Photo and Was Stunned by My Friends’ Reactions

When you hit the big 5-0, if you’re like most, a wave of melancholy can wash over you. Regrets amplify, that knee injury from a long-ago relationship becomes a sharper reminder of time passed, and there’s a compulsive urge to check your retirement savings, leading to panic.

But there are upsides too, particularly the delightful “I-don’t-care” attitude that comes with age. Dramatic friends no longer keep you awake at night, you unapologetically decline invitations, and entering that stage of life when society seems to forget about your looks can feel liberating. Or so I believed. Hi, I’m Clara, I’m 50 years old, and I faced body-shaming on Instagram because of my large breasts.

My Encounter with Body-Shaming

My encounter with body-shaming began last Monday. Before diving in, let me clarify: Yes, my breasts are real. No, I didn’t choose this, and yes, they are undeniably large. I’m baffled why they continue to grow (weight gain accounts for only part of it), and yes, I’ve consulted with three surgeons regarding a reduction. One quoted me $40,000, another deemed me too overweight for surgery, and the last gasped and said, “You need to fix this immediately.”

Yet, I continue to engage with the world. I go on dates, wear push-up bras (because minimizing ones make me look like a penguin), and I still frolic in the ocean, which I adore. So when the opportunity arose to take a day off work to try stand-up paddle boarding with my childhood friend Tom — whom I hadn’t seen in 35 years — I jumped at the chance.

A Perfect Day

We had a fantastic day. I eventually figured out how to stand, and Tom was a supportive and humorous instructor. We watched pelicans up close and enjoyed the joyful shouts of children running to the water. Later, we relaxed on the beach while Tom shared the heartbreaking story of his daughter who passed away from cancer six years ago. Sandy, salty, and warm, we then indulged in delicious pork belly banh mi sandwiches.

It was a perfect day, which is why I decided to share a photo of myself on the paddle board on Instagram later that evening. I’ve always used (or used to, for reasons that will unfold) Instagram as a visual diary: showcasing new rescue dogs, memorials for previous pets, half-finished art projects, hikes, beach days, and time spent with my horse and old friends. I’m not promoting a brand or a cause, just capturing moments.

The Unexpected Backlash

So, it never crossed my mind that posting this photo would lead to body-shaming. Perhaps that sounds naive. My friend Jake later scolded me for thinking otherwise. But to me, it was simply a snapshot of a lovely day.

The comments began innocuously enough: “Well, babe, you certainly won’t drown.” But quickly escalated. My friend Emma — or so I thought she was a friend — chimed in with, “I’m glad SOMEONE said something,” paired with laughing emojis, as if I had done something wrong. Meanwhile, my friend Sarah — who I also believed was a friend — jumped in with “LMFAO!” and added her own “WHY DO THEY KEEP GROWIN’?!” accompanied by more laughing emojis. The hashtag #Melontitty emerged as the most popular.

I attempted to lighten the mood with comments like “Hush” and eventually “You do know I didn’t choose this, right?” But it was like tossing a pebble into the ocean; the comments kept rolling in. They weren’t going to miss the chance to remind me about my “too large” breasts.

Dear reader, I cried. Not only was I reminded of a body part I already loathe, but the comments made me feel like I had broken some unspoken social rule. I thought I was simply sharing a photo of myself enjoying the sun and water. Am I aware that I look somewhat ridiculous? Yes. Did I expect people to seize the opportunity to remind me of it? Absolutely not.

Reflections on Body Positivity

With the rise of the body positivity movement (of which I am an avid supporter), had I posted a photo celebrating a larger body, I might have received encouraging comments. If I had shared an image in a bikini showcasing deep scars from a botched surgery — like my friend Mia — I might have received supportive remarks. But large breasts still seem to be a taboo subject. Is it because they evoke notions of sexuality and fertility, linking them to society’s objectification of women? Likely so. Despite our progress, we continue to live in a puritanical society, at least among my friends on Instagram.

I don’t want to navigate the unwritten rules of body image. I just want to use Instagram to document my life, but I’m done with it now. Jake, who warned me about the potential backlash, suggested that I shouldn’t quit Instagram but instead just “be less bold.” “Bold,” in this context, meant having the audacity not to cover up my body while paddle boarding.

No thanks. I refuse to waste mental energy determining what constitutes “bold” versus “less bold.” I won’t partake in a system that punishes me for having a body that doesn’t fit a narrow mold.

Finding Solace

A few days later, still feeling emotional, I posted my first meme on Instagram—simply saying “Pause” over a serene ocean wave background. In the comments, I explained that Instagram no longer serves me. I’ll miss the recipes and adorable dog photos, but I can’t have it both ways.

That night, while still feeling down, my new rescue dog — whom I’d begun to doubt adopting because of his timid nature — jumped onto the bed, curled up next to me, and rested his cheek against mine. He became my companion that day. I stopped caring that he wasn’t going to be the adventurous dog I had envisioned. True friendship means being able to show your true self, including your body and your tears, without someone laughing at you. If I can find that connection with a dog who doesn’t have an Instagram account, that’s more than enough for me.

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In summary, after sharing a paddle boarding photo, Clara faced unexpected body-shaming comments from friends on social media, leading her to reevaluate her relationship with Instagram. Despite the hurtful remarks about her body, she found solace in her new rescue dog, embracing the idea of true companionship without judgment.

Keyphrase: body shaming on social media

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