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I find myself hesitant to return to what was once considered normal. The mere thought of it, along with the articles circulating on the subject, sends my anxiety levels soaring like never before.
The COVID-19 pandemic has been devastating, with tragic losses in health and life. While I long for the sickness and suffering to cease, I also recognize that sometimes, out of adversity springs something positive. The rise of alternatives to traditional, in-person education is a prime example of this.
For many, the routine of daily life can be a source of distress, especially for kids. School, in particular, can be a place of suffering—not the type that leads to immediate harm but rather a slow, exhausting drain on one’s energy and well-being. I experienced this as a child, and now my own child finds themselves in a similar predicament. Both of us are considered twice exceptional (2E), a term that reflects having at least one disability alongside a gifted area.
I won’t disclose my child’s specific challenges to respect their privacy, but I can share my own experiences: I have ADHD, probable Asperger’s (though I know it’s no longer labeled as such, it resonates), severe anxiety, OCD, complex PTSD, panic disorder, and sensory sensitivities. Being around others—no matter how much I love them—can be draining. Without regular breaks for solitude, I experience physical symptoms that can be overwhelming.
Schools are often noisy environments filled with visual distractions. They require students to make frequent, quick transitions and to remain seated and quiet for extended periods. It’s easy to see how this can be difficult for those of us with sensory sensitivities or attention challenges. Additionally, kids with ADHD often face rejection sensitive dysphoria (RSD), where even minor criticisms feel like deep cuts, compounded by the fact that they tend to be criticized more often for their focus difficulties.
There seems to be no real escape from the constant buzz of activity. You have to endure until the end of the school day, and homework often follows you home, though thankfully, schools are starting to reduce the amount of homework assigned.
I requested a hybrid schedule for my child as part of their IEP, allowing them to spend part of the week at home and part in school. The administration deemed it impossible. However, when the pandemic struck, schools quickly adapted to ensure the safety of their students. It’s crucial that we retain those changes for children like mine, who struggle in traditional settings.
Virtual schooling was a challenge for two of my three children. We managed to finish the 2019-2020 school year, but I dreaded the start of the new school year. My older kids struggled to focus on screens for extended periods. I had long considered homeschooling, and this felt like the perfect opportunity to try it out.
Homeschooling turned out to be a revelation. My children thrived; they even began to ask for school. We could move through subjects at our own pace, leaving room for activities beyond screen time. They became more cooperative and engaged with each other, and the frequent tantrums and meltdowns that once plagued us diminished significantly.
Transitioning away from traditional schooling has also provided benefits for parents. Despite my fears regarding the pandemic, I found that I thrived in many ways. There were no hectic schedules, no overwhelming piles of school paperwork, and fewer emails to manage. While many of these elements are important, the cumulative stress can be overwhelming, especially for neurodivergent parents or those with multiple children. Without that pressure, my anxiety lessened, and I had more time to focus on my health and pursue writing goals.
Of course, it wasn’t a perfect situation; having the entire family at home can be challenging. However, my husband already worked from home, and we employed a nanny, making our pandemic experience less chaotic than others. I understand that for many, the sudden shift was difficult and deprived them of vital social interactions. Conversely, introverts and those with special needs often found themselves craving the peace and quiet typically absent in a traditional school setting.
For now, homeschooling suits us, and I plan to continue. My child in virtual schooling will likely return to in-person classes in the fall. I acknowledge the privilege I hold in having these options, and I want every child to experience an education that fits their needs. Public schools should offer diverse options so that factors like schedule flexibility or financial constraints don’t dictate a child’s educational path. I envision public schools at their best, enabling our children to thrive in their unique ways.
Not every parent or child prefers homeschooling. Many kids excel in traditional school settings, including one of my own. Others may thrive in virtual school, especially with a mix of asynchronous learning. Some students don’t require eight hours in a classroom; they flourish when allowed to move around, interact, and dive deeper into subjects as needed. Older students often find they can complete their education in just a few hours, enabling them to work and develop essential life skills concurrently.
When people insist that children must return to traditional schooling, it frustrates me. Such statements overlook the myriad children who aren’t well-served by conventional education systems. I worry that schools will revert to old habits and retract accommodations made during the pandemic, forcing everyone back into a one-size-fits-all approach.
Schools have made strides toward improvement, working diligently to provide flexibility for those in need. I’ve witnessed this firsthand, yet I believe there’s still room for growth. Over the past year, some positive changes were made, and I hope we don’t abandon them. We need flexibility in both workplaces and school schedules to create a supportive environment for everyone, especially for those for whom traditional schooling isn’t an option. We achieved significant progress this past year, and I believe we can collaborate to offer options that cater to all families, ensuring that no one is left to struggle in silence.
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Summary:
This article discusses the challenges faced by neurodivergent children in traditional school settings and highlights the benefits of alternative education forms, like homeschooling. The author shares personal experiences and emphasizes the need for flexibility in education to accommodate all types of learners. It advocates for maintaining the adaptations made during the pandemic to support those who struggle in conventional environments.
Keyphrase: School alternatives for neurodivergent children
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