A Special Note for Solo Moms This Mother’s Day

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The past few weeks have been a whirlwind. Solo parenting is challenging even on the best days; on the worst, it feels like navigating a swirling kaleidoscope. When those tough days pile up into a week—or even longer—solo parenting turns into a struggle to simply hang on.

I’m just now finding my footing after one of those chaotic stretches. Along with the usual responsibilities of being a solo mom, I faced two late-night health scares where having another parent could have made a world of difference. I had to make significant decisions for my children’s future without the input of someone who truly understands and loves them as I do. I also had to figure out how to be in three places at once.

As I come out of this hectic period, I realize Mother’s Day is approaching. The greeting card aisle is bursting with pinks and pastels. My social media feeds are filled with sentimental ads and vendors are bombarding me with reminders of what moms really want this Mother’s Day.

From these ads, it seems that moms are looking for more sleep, a moment of peace, and perhaps a piece of jewelry engraved with their children’s initials. Those things sound lovely. A few years ago, before my partner passed away and I became a solo parent, I likely would have wanted the same.

These days, though, I often wish I could skip Mother’s Day entirely. From my vantage point as a solo parent, this day—traditionally centered around the idea of having a partner to provide a “day off” and to handle gifts and celebrations—serves as a stark reminder that I am managing everything alone. In the midst of a pandemic, this realization can feel overwhelmingly exhausting.

Honestly, it’s easier to overlook that reality. It’s simpler to just wake up on the second Sunday in May, tackle the tasks that keep my kids and me moving forward, and try not to dwell on the heavy weight of doing it all solo.

This year, however, everything feels different. Perhaps, in a way, Mother’s Day can serve as a reminder I actually need. Maybe this year I should acknowledge that I am doing it all on my own—because I’ve started to overlook just how extraordinary that is. I can’t be the only solo mom who, while caught up in the daily grind, forgets to step back and appreciate all that she has achieved. Perhaps I’m not the only one who needs this reminder on Mother’s Day that what we are doing is indeed remarkable and worthy of recognition.

I won’t use the word “strong”—that term can feel dismissive. Many solo moms might agree. It’s not that “strong” is an insult, but often we feel the opposite. We simply carry on because we must, holding our heads high for our kids’ sake.

Labeling our daily struggles as “strong” can obscure the reality that we frequently feel like we’re barely holding it together. Mother’s Day should be about feeling cherished and acknowledged, not about feeling invisible.

Extraordinary is a better fit for what solo moms have accomplished during this pandemic year. Maintaining a household single-handedly—regardless of how smoothly it all runs—is beyond the ordinary. Nurturing our children in a world that feels unstable is nothing short of extraordinary, even on days when it doesn’t seem that way.

Mother’s Day can be tough for many people for various reasons. While it’s a day to honor mothers, it can also highlight what’s missing for others. My heart goes out to everyone facing difficulties this Mother’s Day. There are no words that can truly ease that pain.

For the solo moms out there, take a moment to reflect on everything you’ve achieved alone. You deserve to feel seen, heard, and celebrated because, truly, what you’re doing is extraordinary.

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Summary:

Solo moms face unique challenges, especially around Mother’s Day, a time that can feel especially isolating. This year, it’s essential to recognize the extraordinary efforts of solo mothers in maintaining their households and caring for their children, often without support. Mother’s Day serves as a reminder to celebrate the remarkable resilience and accomplishments of solo moms, encouraging them to acknowledge their hard work and dedication.

Keyphrase: Solo moms on Mother’s Day

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