Moms Are Not Meant to Be Perfect

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April 18, 2021

Parenting has truly pushed me to my limits lately. I know it may sound harsh, but every day feels overwhelmingly challenging. Whether it’s navigating the teenage years, co-parenting with my ex-husband, or dealing with my constantly strained finances, it all seems to pile up. If it’s not one issue, it’s another. Parenting can feel like the demanding job of a CEO, constantly juggling love for our “employees” while stressing over their futures. Balancing affection with discipline and maintaining a fun yet authoritative presence is nearly impossible. Every morning, I hope to improve — to reach that elusive perfection — and every day, I find myself falling short.

My love for my kids is immeasurable. They bring joy and laughter into my life like nothing else. Yet, when they go to their dad’s, the ache of missing them is profound. Guilt creeps in, and I long for a chance to redo our time together, to be the ideal mother I aspire to be. Despite knowing that perfection is unattainable, I continue to set those impossible standards for myself.

My mother, who raised five kids, always said, “You are only as happy as your saddest child,” and she couldn’t be more right. There’s always one child feeling sad, anxious, or left out. It wounds me deeply, no matter the reason behind their feelings. I often feel responsible for their happiness, believing that if I were just a better mom, they wouldn’t face sadness. If I only chose the right words, or provided more fun experiences, their pain would vanish. I want to alleviate every hurt, and sometimes, I trick myself into thinking I can.

But the truth is, no amount of effort will make me perfect, nor will it completely erase their struggles. Perhaps that’s not the worst thing. My kids need to understand that life isn’t always fair and that pain is a part of it. As their mother, my role may not be to shield them from every discomfort but to help them learn and grow from it. I need to accept both my imperfection and theirs and focus on doing my best each day, knowing that neither motherhood nor life can be perfect.

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In summary, motherhood is filled with ups and downs, and perfection is not a realistic goal. Embracing our flaws can lead to growth for both parents and children, reminding us that life is an imperfect journey.

Keyphrase: Moms Are Not Meant to Be Perfect

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