Parenting Insights
By Emma Johnson
A few weeks back, I shared our journey of getting a psychiatric service dog for my 11-year-old son. Over recent months, I have candidly discussed the various therapies and interventions we utilize for my two wonderful boys, both of whom have special needs. For the past three years, I have endeavored to articulate, while still safeguarding my children’s privacy, the realities of our daily lives.
We are learning to thrive despite the multitude of diagnoses that we no longer even list, primarily due to the thoughtful treatment choices we’ve made.
Since revealing our service dog story, I have been heartened to connect with other families who have taken similar paths with inspiring results. I’ve encountered many mothers online who are exploring this option and seeking as much information as they can gather.
However, I’ve also received the same questioning emails and comments that arise every time I share a new strategy for my sons’ care, each one echoing a somewhat accusatory tone: Does he truly need it? Does my child with special needs genuinely require these treatments, therapies, and interventions? The short answer is yes.
The more nuanced response is this: He needs something. He is facing challenges, and we are committed to assisting him in the best ways possible. The truth is, we never really know which therapies or treatments will be effective. It’s akin to tossing spaghetti against the wall to see what sticks.
And we, as his parents, are not alone in this approach. Consult any healthcare professional or specialist working with medically complex children, and they will affirm that there is no definitive way to predict what will work for each individual child. Therefore, we try different options one after the other until we find the right fit.
You just read my standard explanatory response. Here’s my candid, “I’m utterly exhausted” reaction to this question: No one embarks on this journey for enjoyment.
No individual would exhaust their finances to acquire a service dog if they had never even contemplated getting a pet before. No parent relishes the countless forms, inquiries, and occasional judgment faced while seeking therapy that their insurance may likely deny coverage for.
No one takes joy in subjecting their child to yet another blood test at the phlebotomist’s office. No one celebrates the unwanted attention that arises when their child experiences a rapid weight gain due to medication.
The reality is, we are not engaging in all the various therapies that many suggest are essential. Speech therapy, physical therapy, educational support, additional occupational therapy, and at least three other prescribed medications have been recommended for my sons. For various reasons, including the simple fact that there are not enough hours in the day, we are not currently pursuing all of them.
We might at some point. We might not.
The decisions regarding my sons’ treatment plans are made after careful consideration and are evaluated against all other interventions we are currently implementing. This process is fluid; it shifts based on progress, age, developmental needs, and, frankly, financial constraints.
We are doing our utmost for these children, and while it’s likely we make mistakes along the way, we are acting to the best of our abilities within our circumstances.
There are times when we experience wonderful breakthroughs, and other moments when we face significant setbacks. But rest assured, we have never concluded a day with the thought, “What else can we add to our already full plate? Let’s throw in another hour-long therapy session!”
Does my son need these interventions? Yes. He requires all of them and more, every single day. I am thankful that we can provide them, and I am grateful to witness the progress and genuine healing that result from his treatment plan.
This is precisely why I share our experiences. We need to support one another, exchange what is working, and encourage each other to persist. More than any therapy, we need compassion, grace, and the reassurance that we are not alone in this journey.
This holds true for my son, for me as his mother, and I believe it resonates with you as well.
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Summary:
Navigating the world of treatments and therapies for a child with special needs can be overwhelming. Parents often face skepticism regarding the necessity of various interventions. However, every child’s needs are unique, and finding the right support is essential for their well-being. While the journey may be fraught with challenges, parents strive to do their best, driven by compassion and the desire to help their children thrive.