My daughter, Lily, is about to turn 14, and looking at her, you might not realize just how much of a miracle that is. With her vibrant “unicorn-colored” hair, a pair of Converse sneakers always on her feet, and a cell phone permanently glued to her hand, she seems like an average teenager. But Lily is far from typical. She is a fighter who has been battling autoimmune encephalitis for the last five years—a condition that causes her body to attack her brain—as well as a mitochondrial disorder that has nearly taken her life more than once.
For Lily, life is delicate. To help her navigate it, she relies on several supports. For instance, she has a port in her chest for monthly infusions and a feeding tube in her stomach for continuous nutrition. These supports can be easily hidden and don’t require constant explanations. However, her most visible support, a seizure alert dog named Max, attracts a lot of attention.
While Lily is proud of Max and is always happy to explain his role, what he does is just as critical as the medical equipment she uses. People should respect that, just as they would not touch the tube coming from her stomach. Sadly, many don’t understand this, which jeopardizes Lily’s safety. If Max is distracted and not “tasking,” he might miss the scent that signals an impending seizure, potentially leaving Lily vulnerable in an unfamiliar environment.
Max was trained for 18 months by a professional agency. He can sense when Lily is about to seize—about five minutes in advance—and alerts her, allowing her to take precautions. He’s also trained to seek help if a seizure occurs unexpectedly. Since Max came home, Lily has not had to go to the hospital due to complications from seizures. Max allows her to live a more normal life, and gives me the reassurance to let her explore her independence.
Unfortunately, the curiosity and entitlement of others can threaten this safety net and it’s incredibly frustrating. Just last Friday, while I was running into Walmart to grab a mouthguard for my son’s football practice, Lily asked if she could browse the jewelry section. Initially hesitant, I remembered my hopes for Lily’s independence thanks to Max, and agreed. She assured me, “I’ll call if I need you.” But soon enough, I received a frantic call. “Mom, they’re yelling at me! They won’t stop following me! All I said was he’s a service dog. Please help!”
When I found her, she was visibly shaken, pointing out two women who were yelling. I approached them calmly, asking what the issue was. Instead of an explanation, they unleashed a torrent of profanity, criticizing Lily and Max for being in the store. Another woman joined in, and as the chaos escalated, Lily went into a seizure. Max immediately lay over her to protect her, licking her face to keep her calm, while the original woman continued yelling. Her own children looked terrified.
Security intervened and helped me get Lily to their office. On the surveillance footage, we saw two children approaching Max and Lily trying to explain that he shouldn’t be petted. When her request was ignored, things escalated to a point that could have been catastrophic. It’s inexcusable. While the children’s curiosity is understandable, the adults should have respected Lily’s boundaries and the importance of her medical equipment.
Please, for the love of all that is good, do not touch a service dog, and teach your children to keep their distance as well. Dogs like Max may be cuter than feeding tubes and oxygen monitors, but they are just as vital. If they are distracted by being petted, they can lose focus on their person, which could have deadly consequences.
Max is a joyful dog and the light of Lily’s life. He enjoys cuddling, sleeps beside her, and plays with his toys just like any other dog. However, when he’s wearing his vest and they’re out in public, he knows it’s time to do his job. Being a service dog is not suited for every pup, but it is perfect for him.
Lily’s visit to the store ended with legal action taken against her aggressors, but the emotional impact was much deeper. We left that day with two broken hearts. The very dog meant to provide Lily with independence and safety inadvertently placed her in a frightening and dangerous situation, all because someone couldn’t comprehend that Max serves a purpose beyond entertainment. Because of their selfishness, both Lily and Max now carry a new fear of the world around them.
Let this be a teachable moment. When someone asks you not to pet their service dog, they aren’t being rude; they’re just trying to protect their wellbeing.
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Summary: A fellow parent’s outburst over a service dog highlights the importance of respecting boundaries for those with disabilities. The story illustrates the vital role service dogs play in providing independence and safety, while emphasizing the need for awareness and understanding from the public.
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