A few months back, while aimlessly browsing my TikTok feed, I stumbled upon a delightful video featuring a plus-size woman enjoying a glass of wine and critiquing the lack of body diversity on ABC’s The Bachelor. She began by expressing her frustration, mentioning she had been a viewer “since Day 1” yet had never seen anyone who resembled her on the show. She emphasized that not including plus-size individuals perpetuates the misconception that larger women can’t experience love or achieve their own fairy tale.
Her message resonated deeply, but it was her warm and engaging personality that encouraged me to learn more. This TikTok account belongs to body positive influencer Jamie Lane from the Chicago area and her “fat best friend,” event coordinator Mia Torres. Together, they co-host a podcast called Swipefat that explores the complexities of dating while plus-size.
To be frank, dating isn’t something I often ponder. After being married for many years and meeting my husband at eighteen—my first boyfriend—I never had to navigate the dating scene. However, Jamie and Mia’s TikTok felt so relatable and approachable that I quickly turned to Apple Podcasts to listen to Swipefat. Despite my lack of dating experience, I found myself nodding along, fully engaged by their discussions that are incredibly relatable to me as a plus-size woman, regardless of my current relationship status. I even felt a twinge of envy that they get to share a friendship in real life while I remain just a listener. Jamie and Mia are the honest, funny “fat best friends” I wish I had.
Fortunately, Jamie and Mia agreed to chat with us about their work, personal journeys, and the realities of dating in today’s world.
On the Inspiration Behind Jamie’s Viral TikTok About The Bachelor:
“We’re starting to see more representation in the media, but reality TV still lacks diversity in body types. It’s unrealistic,” Jamie points out. “Seeing people who look like us in those fairytale narratives can change how we view our own stories.”
On Building Confidence in Plus-Size Bodies:
“I’ve been plus-size my whole life,” Mia shares. “Growing up in the media spotlight, I faced public bullying, which left its mark. I eventually realized that my worth isn’t tied to my size, and I started to genuinely embrace self-love.”
“I wasn’t always confident either,” Jamie admits. “But I realized I have a vibrant personality. My journey to body positivity began on Instagram as a food blogger, which isn’t common for someone my size. The positive feedback pushed me forward.”
On Embracing the Term “Fat”:
“Why is ‘fat’ a bad word? We’ve labeled it negatively, associating it with laziness or unhealthiness. That mindset needs to change,” Jamie asserts. “You can be fat and healthy, just as you can be thin and unhealthy.”
On the Challenges of Dating While Plus-Size:
Mia notes, “Dating is tough for everyone, but being plus-size adds another layer. There’s this pressure to preemptively warn potential partners about our bodies, even when our profiles are honest. We worry about disappointing them or being fetishized.”
Jamie adds, “It’s complicated. Navigating these dynamics can feel overwhelming.”
On Learning from Rejection:
“Rejection is a valuable teacher,” Jamie explains. “Each time you face it, it becomes a little less daunting. It’s essential to remember that it’s a two-way street; you have power in these interactions.”
Top Tips for Plus-Size Dating:
- Just Take the Plunge. Mia encourages, “Even if you’re anxious, just jump in! Recognize your value—you’re attractive and have so much to offer beyond your appearance.”
- Collaborate with Friends on Your Profile. “Make it a fun night with friends,” Mia suggests.
- Be Honest with Your Photos. “Use pictures that make you feel great, but also represent who you are,” Jamie advises.
In addition to their podcast, Jamie and Mia star in a FreebieTV series titled Dating in the Modern Age, which chronicles their dating experiences as plus-size women during a pandemic. They also manage a private Facebook group for plus-size women navigating dating, where members share outfit ideas before dates.
Jamie and Mia are inspiring figures who remind other plus-size women that they are worthy of love. “Being fat doesn’t diminish your value in a relationship,” Mia asserts.
To dive deeper into their discussions, you can listen to Swipefat on Spotify and Apple Podcasts. For more insights on related topics, check out our other blog post here and explore this authority site for more information.
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In summary, Jamie Lane and Mia Torres are reshaping the narrative around dating while plus-size through their engaging podcast, Swipefat. They empower listeners to embrace their bodies and recognize their worth, reminding us that love knows no size.
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