It’s no secret that new parents experience significant sleep deprivation, but recent findings indicate just how desperate they truly are for rest. A collaborative study involving ParentingGuide and Dr. Emily Foster, author of the highly regarded parenting book The Joyful Parent, reveals that new moms and dads crave sleep more than intimacy, and by a substantial margin.
According to the survey, an astounding 62 percent of parents identified sleeplessness as their top challenge, while only 26 percent claimed that lack of sexual intimacy posed the biggest issue. Additionally, 48 percent expressed a desire for more time in their busy lives, and 34 percent were concerned about financial limitations. Despite these substantial life hurdles, sleep reigns supreme—indicating just how critical it is for these exhausted parents.
On average, new parents are getting just 5.7 hours of sleep each night, which explains why a staggering 78 percent reported feeling tired or completely drained in the past week. Exhaustion has almost become a default state for many of us in this parenting journey.
Interestingly, parents who manage to squeeze less than five hours of sleep each night often report feeling less joy and satisfaction in their parenting roles, although their love for their children remains unaffected. Dr. Emily Foster commented, “Today, parents are sharing childcare responsibilities more equally than in the past. While this doesn’t completely solve the sleep deficit, it helps mitigate some of the frustration that can arise from exhaustion.”
However, Dr. Foster emphasizes the importance of addressing chronic fatigue seriously: “Lack of sleep can impair cognitive function to the same degree as alcohol intoxication! In some households, it can lead to marital tension, postpartum depression, and even dangerous situations, such as falling asleep with the baby in unsafe environments.” The survey backs this up, revealing that 54 percent of parents are experiencing anxiety due to sleeplessness, with 44 percent feeling frustration and 47 percent feeling distant from their partners.
The silver lining? As babies reach the four-month milestone, 90 percent of parents report returning to their intimate lives, with 86 percent feeling more love and connection after welcoming their little ones. So, while sleepless nights can feel endless, many parents find the experience worth it in the long run. However, they still yearn for more rest.
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In summary,
new parents overwhelmingly prioritize sleep over other aspects of their lives, with a significant percentage facing various challenges stemming from sleep deprivation. While the journey of parenthood can be exhausting, the joy and love that come with it make it all worthwhile.