During what would have been her son Jack’s birth week, influencer and author Megan Ellis opened up about her emotional journey following the loss of her child. In September 2020, Megan and her partner, Jake Foster, shared the heartbreaking news of their loss at 20 weeks. As the due date approaches, Megan has been reflecting on her grief and its ongoing impact on her life.
“This week would have been the week my little Jack was born, and I’m feeling a bit off,” she posted on social media. “I genuinely feel kicks in my belly, but it’s not just phantom sensations. I have surgery for endometriosis tomorrow… and this month’s cramping feels just like baby kicks – sigh.” She also shared a video of her abdomen, poignantly illustrating the phantom kicks, stating, “I’ll pretend it’s him saying hi – it never stops.”
On the day of her surgery, Megan posted a video of herself waiting, captioning it, “Endometriosis surgery. Please endo this pain.”
Understanding Endometriosis
For those unfamiliar, endometriosis affects approximately 11% of women in the U.S. between the ages of 15 and 44. This painful condition occurs when tissue similar to the inner lining of the uterus grows outside the uterus. While kicks aren’t a recognized symptom, this condition often results in severe pelvic pain and cramping that can be more intense than typical menstrual pain.
After initially stepping back from social media to process her grief, Megan later expressed her feelings in an essay, sharing, “People say losing a child leaves a hole in your heart. A hole was certainly made, but it was filled with the love of something I cherished deeply. This space doesn’t feel empty; it feels full.”
In her social media updates, she reflected, “When I’m older, I’ll remember these last months as brutally challenging. But I refuse to let go of the humor in my rage-fits and my outfits.” She expressed gratitude for her partner’s support during this tough time, noting her progress in daily tasks.
Sharing Her Journey
In a poignant Instagram post, Megan shared a photo of her postpartum body, revealing her bump and expressing her feelings about never being pregnant again. “This is me, just yesterday. Even though I’m no longer pregnant, every glance in the mirror reminds me of what could have been. And I don’t understand why I still have this bump, honestly. It’s frustrating,” she shared, adding that she is grateful for her two wonderful children who are growing more every day.
Resources for Further Reading
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In summary, Megan Ellis’s heartfelt reflections during what would have been her son Jack’s birth week highlight the ongoing journey of grief and healing. She shares her experiences with endometriosis, her emotional struggles, and the importance of support during this challenging time.
Keyphrase: pregnancy loss and healing
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