This past week made me reflect on my parenting abilities. My daughter logged into her virtual school with a messy knot in her hair that was so unruly, I was grateful the camera couldn’t capture the full extent of it. My son had his check-up, and the pediatrician noted he had dropped off his growth curve. She questioned me about his diet, pointing out where he was eating too many processed foods and not enough fruits and vegetables. I opened my mouth to explain myself, but then thought better of it. Ultimately, his nutrition was my responsibility.
That evening, my son reminded me that we hadn’t gotten around to those multiplication flashcards I had left out to jog my memory. He didn’t seem upset, but I definitely was. I hadn’t exactly forgotten; I just ran out of hours in the day.
As I tucked my daughter in, she shared stories about her school friends, whom she hadn’t seen in ages, and then boasted about her Fortnite achievements. Inside, I chastised myself. I had intended to help her find ways to socialize more and spend less time gaming, but the day had slipped away from me.
By the time I got to bed, I had a familiar mental checklist of things I would do better tomorrow. Tomorrow, I would balance work, manage the household, and solo-parent my two kids seamlessly during a pandemic—easy, right?
But the next day came and went without perfection. While I did manage to sneak in more vegetables for my son and encouraged my daughter to FaceTime a friend, I still hadn’t done the laundry, leaving both kids rummaging for clean socks. And yet, I forgot those flashcards yet again.
The reality is that big moments often lead me to feel like I’m falling short as a parent. However, I remind myself that I’m not failing completely because of the small moments that shine through.
The year after my husband passed away, I felt like I was letting my kids down in countless ways. I couldn’t be two parents when I struggled to be one. I missed appointments and allowed my daughter and I to stay up late cramming for tests because I forgot to encourage her to start studying sooner. I was doing my best, but I wished I could do more. I worried about the impact of “my best” on my kids.
Then, on the anniversary of my husband’s death, my son left a note for him at his grave that read: “We are happy.” In that moment, I realized that despite the struggles, we were okay.
Recently, another small but significant moment stood out amidst the chaos of forgotten flashcards and too many processed meals. During a family trip to a Starbucks drive-through, fueled by my caffeine craving and a last-ditch effort to get my kids off their screens, we engaged in silly antics. My daughter laughed so hard she cried and then said, “I love this family.”
I know that when I look back on this pandemic year, I’ll remember that simple moment, just like I remember my son’s note from that tough year.
These little instances remind me that, despite the perceived failures, my kids are alright, and I’m doing okay too. The truth is, these moments reveal a greater truth than any pile of laundry or quick meal ever could: I’m a good mom—imperfect, yes, but exactly the mom my kids need.
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Summary:
In the midst of parenting challenges, small moments can illuminate the truth of our efforts. This reflection emphasizes that while parenting can be overwhelming, moments of joy and connection remind us that we are doing our best. The article highlights the importance of acknowledging both successes and failures, ultimately reinforcing the idea that being a good mom is about striving for balance and cherishing the little moments.
Keyphrase: Small Moments of Parenting
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