We all have them: frenemies. Some moms seem to attract more than their fair share. These are the “friends” whose words and actions often leave you feeling down. Whether they’re being passive-aggressive or outright hostile, dealing with a frenemy can be incredibly frustrating. You want to care for them, but they make it nearly impossible.
Frenemies love to deliver backhanded compliments and subtly imply they’re superior to you in some way. Most of the time, these individuals are simply insecure and struggling with their own issues. However, that doesn’t lessen the sting of their behavior. Sometimes, it’s someone you’ve known for a long time, making it hard to sever ties. Other times, it’s a colleague who seems supportive over lunch but later uses your vulnerabilities against you. Or maybe it’s just a jealous person who has nothing else going on in their life.
Take Jessica, for instance. She’s constantly putting me down while whining about her tough life, leading me to finally say, “I’m sorry your life is so miserable and you envy mine. Oh, and please lose my number.” Confessional #25796286 shares a similar sentiment: “My frenemy just bought the house I wanted. So jealous.”
Then there’s Emily, who realized after 30 years that her friend was more of a frenemy. “How do I end this toxic relationship?” she wonders. Meanwhile, Sarah found herself surprised when her nemesis at work became her unexpected ally during a harassment incident. “We agreed we didn’t like each other, but women need to support one another,” she noted in Confessional #25816636.
Frenemies can be incredibly two-faced, acting sweet in front of you but being a completely different person behind your back. Sometimes, they’re just two people who can’t stand each other but manage to keep things civil. However, for those unable to maintain that facade, the manipulation can become unbearable.
As one confessor shared, “My frenemy is getting divorced, and it felt so satisfying to offer her our condo since we just bought a house.” Confessional #25802782 captures the essence of this competitive spirit.
Another common frenemy trait: they often expect favors without ever reciprocating. “I can’t stand how my best friend hung out with my frenemy last night. I’m so jealous!” laments one mom in Confessional #25762310. True friendship involves mutual support, but when it’s one-sided, you’ve got a frenemy on your hands.
Social media has only intensified our awareness of these relationships. One confessor admitted, “I think of my frenemy whenever I buy new clothes, just in case I run into her.”
If your friend consistently makes you feel inadequate or disregards your needs, it’s a sign of a frenemy relationship. If you find yourself wanting to unfriend someone on social media but are too apprehensive to do so, it might be time to reconsider the friendship altogether.
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In summary, frenemies can complicate our lives, especially in the realm of motherhood. Their actions can leave us feeling inadequate and frustrated, but recognizing these traits can help us navigate these tricky friendships. If your friend’s behavior is consistently negative, it may be time to reevaluate the relationship.
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